What did the rock say to the other rock? Nothing they're rocks? What did the tree say to the other tree? Nothing they're both trees? What did the pillow say to the other pillow? Nothing they're both pillows? What did the cat say to the other cat? Meow.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the Batmobile? Get in the Batmobile.

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"The Civil War wasn't won in a day, it was won in a lifetime." -Marc Cruz

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What's green and invisible? Nothing; green and all other colours of the rainbow have wavelengths that occur specifically in the visible range of the electromagnetic spectrum. Therefore any invisible object cannot be green.

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What do you call a broken boomarang? A stick.

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What did the black fire-fighter do when the house caught fire? The heroic man ran inside and got every animal and person inside to the out side and then proceeded to extinguish the flames with his fire-extinguisher out, thus saving most of the families valuables. He was then awarded a raise in his salary for his heroic valor. Although any fire-fighter could have done this because of the hard work and dedication that is put into training. So really describing the race that this heroic man is was totally pointless.

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What did the people say to each other when they ate the orange? Orange you glad I didn't eat you:) HAHAHAA orange you glad that I am good at telling jokes!

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends how hard you throw them.

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Knock knock Who's there? Doctor. Doctor who? Dr. Jeremy Brown, I have your results from the blood test. It's good news they came back negative. Hooray.

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Roses are red,violets are blue you want me but i dont want you!

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What's the only think duct tape can't fix? Your parents divorce.

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What's black, white and red all over? Half a penguin.

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Tim: Hey Jennifer, do you wanna hear a joke? Jennifer: Okay Tim: Knock knock Jennifer: Who's there Tim: It's me Tim, you idiot

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What do you call a girl with no legs? Disabled.

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Q. what sucks A. getting robbed loosing your family and then you die by cancer

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A tree falls in the woods. A deaf boy, who had been frolicking through the forest, is struck down by the tree. He dies. His parents are ridden with grief for years, until finally the father commits suicide. The mother soon remarried and had two more children. Both died before the age of 15. She was a horrible mother.

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What do you call something thats mostly made of wood, big, round and stupid A retarded version of the Knights of the round table

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Husband: Take the f out of way. Wife: There's no f in way! Husband: You just swore

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What do you call a black person who puts out fires? a firefighter

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What's a pirates favorite element the periodic table? Gold.

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My mother forgot to make me a sandwich today.

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How do you get 100 Jews into a Volkswagon? You don't. It's impossible to fit that many people into a car that small.

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Why is 6 scared of 7? Because 7 is right behind 7 and he's naked.

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Why did Hitler kill so many Jews? Because he didn't like them.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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