What happens when you cross a vampire and a werewolf? A cross between a vampire and a werewolf.

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Why was the baby crying? Because it was on fire.

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How do you kill a blonde? Shoot her.

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Q: How do you count the population of Mexico? A: Take a census.

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Superman, Batman and Spiderman are all in a race. Who wins? Grow up. Superheros aren't real.

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What did the boy do when he ran out of Pringles? He killed himself.

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Poop

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whats yellow? lots of things.

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What's blue and smells like red paint? That blue guy from Megamind.

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Why did Jake fall off his bike? His mom threw a fridge at him.

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Quack Quack Quack Quack Quack Quack Pi pi pi pi Pi pi pi pi Pingu Pingu!

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Why can't Helen Keller conduct a Train. Because she is dead.

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How do you kill an already dead man? You don't he's already dead.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the gun store to buy a gun. After years of abuse and mockery, he was tired of being called "chicken", and was going to shoot up the entire school

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How do you kill a zombie? You don't. Zombies aren't real.

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Am I a cat? No, I am a human; cat's cannot type.

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Q. what's red and smells like blue paint A. a dead baby in a trash can beside a foster home

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Why couldnt the dog bark? The dog didnt exist.

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Yo Momma Is Soooo Fat She Is Highly Obese

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What did the dyslexic say to the nun? When I write, I typically misplace letters in words.

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A blind man, a black man and a rabbi walk into a bar. The blind man trips violently.

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Why did the man fall of his bike? He wasn't on his bike, i drowned him yesterday.

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man 1 walks by man 2 man 1 says hey buddy whats up man 2 responds do i know you man 1 says no but i saw you seeing a movie on friday man 2 says oh cool but wasn't that movie great man 1 responds ya and man 1 and man 2 become best friends plus man 1 only liked man 2 because he was rich!!!

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So I was flirting with a girl at a bar the other day when this huge black guy walks up and says "Hey honey". I realized that I still had some un-addressed prejudices in me as he shook my hand, pointed out that it was a mistake anyone could make, and introduced me to a girl he had met at the college he works at.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops