What's brown and sticky? A Stick!

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That awkward moment when your brother goes to crack his neck, but he dies instead.

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what did the apple say to the peer... I taste better !!

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i look around to find that my air head is missing, i then figure out that i had eaten it.

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what do obama and terrorist have in common -they are both human

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What's the best time to go to the dentist? Whenever your appointment is scheduled.

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why did the chicken cross the road? I don't care! What are you doing in my house?

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What has hands but cannot feel? A sociopath; due to his or her mental health condition they are incapable of feeling true emotion.

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Two girls are in a car together. The one in the drivers seat is texting while driving. The girl in the passenger seat notices this and tells her the she should put it away in case of a risk of a collision. She apologizes and puts it away and the two of them drive to the store unharmed and continued their normal day.

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What do you get when you add a cucumber some vinegar some salt and you get..... Macaroni and cheese

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Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

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A Mexican man, an American man, and an Italian man go to a bridge. The mexican said "we have too much of this in our country!" and throws pasta into the water. The Mexican man says "we have to much of this in out country!" and throws a taco into the water. The American throws in the Mexican man and says "we have to much of these in our country!"

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How can you tell if someone's a Vegan? It will probably come up in conversation, usually during the planning phase of a trip to a restaurant.

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What is orange and sticky? A blue ice cream with no skeletal structure Hang on, Ice Creams don't talk and the ice cream wasn't even yellow!

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You know what's funnier than a pile of dead babies? A pile where one's alive in the middle, and has to eat his way out.

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Two guys walk into a bar, but the third guy is a duck.

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What did the robet say to the centipede? Stop being a centipede. Its funny cuase the robot had no arms.

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Why is little johnny sad? He won the lottery but then found out the next day he had cancer and cried in a corner.

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Whats black, white and dusty? A nuns fan-y because it never gets used

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I drink poodle juice for breakfast lunch and dinner I was then turned into a tree

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Why Lilly fell out of a cradle ? She had no arms.

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What's grey and can't climb trees? A parking lot.

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Why did Princess Diana cross the road? Because she wasnt wearing a seat belt.

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What did the computer say to the mouse? Nothing inanimate objects cant talk

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops