What goes about 36 miles per hour and screams? A baby attached to a ceiling fan.

How do you torture Helen Keller? Tie her down and plant a bamboo seed under her.

what is the difference between a jew and a boy scout? a boy scout comes home from camp

Why did the blond wreak her car? She stayed up a very long time studying for her mid-term exam, And therefore, was not as attentive to the flow of traffic.

Why didn't the black man get the scholarship? Because he didn't apply for it.

A young black guy was explaining how he was raised by a single mother

A grasshopper walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Hey, we have a drink named after you!" Surprised, the grasshopper replies, "You have a drink named 'Bob'?"

Knock Knock : F*ck im watching porn...

Hi

If somebody chucks skittles at you saying taste the frickin rainbow Run over them with a car and say "NationWide is on your side!!! ????

How many pancakes does it take to fill up a doghouse? None, because ice cream doesn't have bones.

What did the spider say to the lobster? Nothing, they are enemies and don't live in the same habitat.

What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Frostbite

Why didn't the chicken cross the road? Because it's in a chicken coop.

One more note for my children: ...My words appeal to your dark, evil side, it is that which might trigger your fear and disgust... But dont blame your fear on me you moron... ....To those that react with fear and disgust towards my comments: You know the fear and disgust in you, your own emotions make you feel fear and disgust for yourselves, because like all and everything that feels the inspiring words of the Black Angel... ...You know you like it ;) The friendly Black Angel/R*pist: God can free you from the temptation I inspired in your heart, but why would you? Now, thumb this comment down, so you can feel "good about yourself" and suffer in life in order to become a slave and serve the one that made you suffer troughout life... You think me, yet you fail to see that if it where me, I would have be Jehovah your GOD!... ...Worry not though, all of those that plan to stick alive for 10-15 years and I allow to live, will get to serve The Only God, your EMPEROR: Moral Man... Know my name and fear it, and yes mortal, you will also be screaming it...

A Man Walks into a Bar with a Dog. He is blind, and is promptly guided to his seat by other patrons.

What did the homeless man get for Christmas?... A warm meal, a shower, and a place to sleep courtesy of the local homeless unit.

Who is yellow and cant drive straight. A man dying of lukemia

What's ripe and orange? A ripe orange.

What does pooh bear call his grandma? Pooh nanny.

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

What happens when a black guy roles over a speed-bump? I don't know. I have never tried it

A young girl walks out of a bar then gets raped.

The Earth is a nice place to live.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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