- Anti Joke

Why was six afraid of seven? Seven was a rapist

Rsoes aer rde, voiltes are bule, i have dyslexia. It's not funny.

Why did the jew kill himself? He heard a raciest joke and went into a period of depresion causing him to lose all will to live.

Q. How did the blind man savvier from walking of a cliff? A. He didn't he died.

What did the girl get for her birthday? the Plan B pill

-Knock Knock -Who's there? -Dave. -Dave who? -Orange you glad I didn't say banana?

What's the best part of the 1980s? They're over.

A man walks into bar carrying a nondescript glass bottle of beer. The bartender speaks up in a harsh tone "We don't allow outside drink here buddy! If you're drinking here, you're buying it from here! The man replies, "Oh I'm sorry, it's just that this isn't a normal beer. Every time you take a swig from it, you are granted one wish!" The bartender, who is at this point getting visibly irritated, "I ain't got no time for fairy tales. Screw off!" The man seemingly unfazed by this anger tells him, "I'm not any kind of liar. I have three sips left. You can have them if you want." The bartender snatches the bottle with his unwashed hands from the man. "Fine" he says gruffly "I'll drink your magic beer." He thinks for a brief minute and says to himself, "I wish I had an expensive sports car." and takes a drink from the bottle. No later then a second later, a Ferrari pulls up into the driveway. It is a sleek and dark red color. It was of the latest model and did not have a single scratch whatsoever. The bartender's eyes pop wide open in astonishment and he quickly makes his second wish, "I wish I had a beautiful girlfriend!". And he took another drink. No later than five seconds, A leggy 5'7 blonde bombshell steps out of the entrance. She dons a short white skirt, Long red stiletto heels and a jet black spaghetti strap top. The bartender starts to sweat and looks a little nervous. "And my final wi-EUGHAAAHGGHHH!" The bartender collapses from the floor drooling from the mouth. It turns out that the liquor he was drinking was 180-proof alcohol that his old liver could not take. The blonde woman steps back and lets out a disgusting shriek. "Ewww, this old ugly hobo just ODed on the floor. Can we go somewhere else for drinks Jeremy?" Her boyfriend replies, "Yeah good idea babe. This place looks a trash heap anyway. You deserve better." The couple do not hesitate in stepping into their sleek red Ferrari and driving off. The man who had given the bartender the beer proceeded to check the dead man's pockets and rob it of all of it's contents. Nobody ever caught the man, and not a single person in the bar cared enough about the bartender to call 911. Moral of the story: Magic does not exist and life sucks.

Gangnam style

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Why don't lesbians use dildoes? Because they look just like a big penises.

Q: Why did Katie fall off the swing? A: She had no arms.. Q: Why didn't she have any arms? A: 50. Cal... Q: Wait where'd she go? A: I don't know there's a helicopter in my scop- wait what the f**k is going on?.... TO: CoD 4 Players -Ap

roses are red vilots are blue in soviot russa poem read you.

Why didn't Superman save the people from 9/11? Because he was a quadriplegic.

Your mom is so fat, that last night after reading and edition of Cosmo, she skipped dinner and cried herself to sleep due to her inability to live up to such an unrealistic feminine stereotype.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got ran over by a car

Why did the chicken cross the road? She had no purpose.

a man walks into a bar the bar tender says why the long face? i just walked into a bar

Q: How did the woman die in the black neighborhood? A: She suffered a fatal heart attack while visiting one of her friends. Everyone mourned their loss.

Why did the child cross the road? Nobody knows, he forgot to look both ways got hit by a truck and suffered severe head trauma leading memorie loss.

Why did Sally fall off the swingset? She had no arms. Knock ,Knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Why? I ASKED YOU FIRST!

Did you hear about Helen Keller's dog? Neither did she.

Why did Suzy fall off the swing? She didn't. Despite losing her arms in a terrible accident as a child, Suzy persevered to become a renowned gymnast. After several turns as a champion Special Olympian, Suzy retired from sports in order to tour elementary schools as a guest speaker. She inspired thousands of disabled children across North America and was a highly-respected orator. Suzy sadly passed away in 2009 at the age of 62. She is survived by her two lovely daughters, Karen and Michelle.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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