- Anti Joke

I woke up in bed with someone this morning. I forget why this is a joke, but your mother is a whore.

How do you make someone think your wierd? Pretend to be a panda.

So you are "The Nero" are you not? How ironic... ...I got nothing on you, let me ask you however, why did you quit the underground society? What changed your lifestyle so much? I mean I accept that you did not do it out of fear or cowardice, but why did you leave it up to the rest of us to try to hold together the last remains of freedom and social information? What? To use your techniques in order to entrance people into buying your books? How is that so different? I am not saying that I consider your methods lesser, because nobody here does, but if you can explain how this makes you better, I would appreciate it, I am certain that most people would.

Did you know Hellen Keller had a swingset? No I didn't. Ya it was actually really nice.

I like my coffee like i like my woman.... with big titis.

Q: why do english soldiers have red coats? A: to cover the blood stains, so they can still lead their platoons when they are shot. why else?

What happens when you give a Parrot a pack of cigarettes? Animal Rights Activists get upset and condemn your actions.

When life gives you melons, your probably dyslexic.

Whats worse than finding a real joke on anti-jokes? -Nothing

What is worse than 10 babies nailed to 1 tree? 1 baby nailed to 10 trees.

17 What's worse than shitting whilst fucking? Losing your eye! Kelvin Yang

What did the cannibal eat for breakfast? Waffles.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because you suck your own dick.

Roofs are Red...I have a Cunt!!!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

Want more? You might be interested in...

Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

Knock Knock Who's There? It's Me. Oh, OK. Come On In.

Why did the chicken get taken into the kitchen? If u dont get this you need to go b ack to school

Why was the boy seeing stars? It was night time.

You know what likes to get fisted? Sock puppets.

Why did the black family cry? Tyler Perry died

What happens when an alien goes out in the rain It gets wet

Why was the girl crying? DEEZ NUTS!

why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

I forgot how the joke starts but the punchline goes something something something your moms a slut.