Why did the black man begin to cry when his friend aimed a gun at a watermelon? Because if he were to shoot it would be a waste of perfectly good food.

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A man walks into a bar. He then walks out of the bar a while after. He then goes home and goes to bed. And then he goes to sleep. And then in an odd time travel paradox,a T-Rex arrives from the past and kills him and his entire family.

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What do you call a man with multiple sexual partners? Well, first you strongly urge him to get tested for any contagious and potentially dangerous STD's that could have been transmitted from one partner's genitalia to another person's genitalia which could have very well been he himself. They could be life threatening. Oh, and call him by his first name.

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What did the boy eat for dinner? Shit.

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A man buys some expensive lingerie for his wife on the occasion of their 10th wedding anniversary. After a lovely candlelight dinner at home, he tells her to close her eyes at which point he retrieves the gift box containing her anniversary present. Thoroughly exited, she rips open the box and takes out the beautiful garment, holding it up to the light in wide-eyed amazement. Her husband gives her a suggestive wink and says "would you like to join me in the bedroom to try it on?" To which she replies, "I AIN'T YER WHORE!"

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Why is Taylor sad? Because she's the middle of a human centipede.

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Whats the difference between a pizza and a Jew? One is a tasty Italian food the other is a respected member of society

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Why did the family have no Christmas tree this year? Because they are Jewish.

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What's the difference between a Boy Scout and a Jew? One comes back from camp.

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Why didn't Little Timmy's parrot talk? It's neck had snapped.

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no pen = no studying no studying = bad grades bad grades = no job no job = no money no money = no food no food = death DON'T LOSE YOUR PEN

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What is Ciaran Wilkie Gay

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What did the one stethoscope say to the other stethoscope? Nothing. Stethoscopes can't talk.

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How many people live in China? At least ten.

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Bob: Your mama's so fat, she rolled over four quarters and made a dollar! Todd: YOur mama's so fat, here's a picture of her tied up in my basement. Todd wins the insult war.

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You tell me. I have amnesia.

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Why was the blonde confused? Because she had 10 second memory loss.

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Black people stink of shite!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The parking lot was across the street from KFC.

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why didn't santa deliver any presents this christmas? Because he isn't real

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a morman walks into a bar, he buys a 7up.

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Why didnt the boy finish the race? Becuase he stepped on a land mine.

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Why could'nt the Jew drink milk? He was laptose intolerant.

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What do a blond and a jar of marmalade have in common? Nothing, they are completely different.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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