What is the main similarity of Darth Vader and Michael Jackson? They are both dead fathers.

Grammar ... the difference between knowing your shit, and knowing you're shit.

why did tom get HIV? He was raped by a giant scorpion

9/11/01 was a terrible day I got dirt on my suit when touring NY

A baby seal walks into a club...

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. The chicken got crushed by a fridge.

Why did the policeman arrest the black man? He had commited a crime and murdered somebody.

An American guy, Chinese guy, and Black guy are on a boat. Who jumps off first? Hopefully no one jumps off, especially because the ocean current is strong. They should call the coast guard if they are lost and find a safe way back to shore.

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? I lost my tractor!

If you have a green ball in your left hand and a green ball your right hand, what do you have? Kermit the Frog's undivided attention

Why did the penis rape the vagina, because it felt good!

how long has dibey got left like :)

Roses are red. Violets are blue. I am colourblind so screw you!

How do you get a one armed blonde out of a tree? Wave to her.

What does Megatron say when a video game takes forever to load? "You have failed me yet again, Start Screen!"

How do you keep a mexican from drowning? Take your foot off the back of his head.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It had just escaped from the slaughterhouse and ran for its life.

There's a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead who sit next to each other in college. They are good students and regularly do their homework.

Why did the U.S.A. vote in a black president? Because racial prejudice is a thing of the past and the U.S.A. is a liberal and progressive nation.

whats purple with fur?nothing mammals cannot have purple fur

What will Postman Pat be called after he retires? Pat.

A priest walks into a bar, which is suprising because priests don't usually go to bars.

Husband: Shut up, there is now playing for Real Madrid Woman: So what? come help me clean. Husband:after the game,now shut up. Woman:Everyone knows Barcelona better... Police: So you're saying your wife fell on the knife alone?

A young boy is concerned about his fathers health, due to the fact he may have cancer. Turns out, he doesn't. So they got ice cream.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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