a blond goes into a taxi, the driver asks where to my friend , the blond says her desired location, gets droped off and trips, falls on her head, suffers major injuries, dies,weeks later the taxi driver drove the family to the funeral, they walk out and one of of them trips and gets back up...

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A black guy and a white guy both get pulled over by a cop for speeding. The white guy is promptly released with a stern warning, whle the black guy is thouroughly questioned and has his car searched for drugs, with the probable cause being that the black guy has bloodshot eyes, reeks of weed and has a bong in his frontseat.

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Tic tac toe. I never met my father

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What's the difference between jam and jelly? Jam is slightly more viscous and may contain bits of fruit.

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i just got all five seasons of big bang theory in the mail for xmas... i'm divorcing my wife.

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Doctor, doctor, it hurts when I hit my head with a hammer!! Dont hit your head with a hammer anymore.

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A guy walks into a bar with a watermelon under his shirt. The bartender asks what is under his shirt. He says, a watermelon.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Get in the van.

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dfasdf sdf ds fds fds f sdf s fs

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Knock knock. Who's there? You're adopted. You're adopt...wait what?

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what did Sandra bullock say to Jesse James? I hate your fickin a**!!:)

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Mary had a little lamb, But it couldn't stop her from being raped.

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Your mom is so cheap, that she eats her cereal with a fork to save milk

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What did hitler say to the bartender? Nothing he's dead.

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What's similar between my butthole and shampoo? They both smell good, except for by butthole.

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Why did the koala fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second koala fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first one. Why did the third koala fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven. One muffin turns to the other and says "Is it hot in here?" The other muffin says "Yes. It feels like 425 degrees."

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Why did that guy die? because the SS thought he was a jew.

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How many flies does it take to screw in a light bulb? Two. Question is, how did they get in there?

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A blonde, brunette, and a redhead walk into a bar. The redhead, growing tired of the constant ridicule directed at her from the other two, kills them. She pleads guilty to 3rd degree murder on two counts and is sentenced two life sentences in a maximum security prison in Cambodia.

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What's black and white and red all over? A pile of dead, mixed-race babies.

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Best joke: Okay so I got a joke for ya but it is pretty long so bare with me please. First off, you must have heard a knock knock joke before and you must have a huge sense of humor. So this guy walks into a bar and orders fried chicken wings with hot fudge and vinilla drizzled all over it with a cherry topping. The bartender says, "We don't have that." The guy thinks of anything else he'd like and says, "How about a bucket of turkey and jalapeños?" The bartender looks puzzled and once again says, "This is a bar..." The guy is now paranoid and says, "Fine, I'll just have a thick, juicy, chicken thigh but please remove any excess skin on it, it's unhealthy and I'm on a diet." The bartender slowly removes his apron and walks out of the bar shouting, "I QUIT!" The guy sits there on the barstool laughing as a lady bartender comes to him. "So sorry sir, what would you like? From our bar that we have available?" The guy stares at her, squinting. "By any chance do you know if you have the punch line to this 'joke' because I sure dont." Slowly the woman removes her apron and walks out of the bar. The guy grins, walks out, and says, "job well done today. Where to tomorrow?"

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your mothers so over weight that when she jumps in a pool she displaces a proportionately larger volume of water then someone with less body mass.

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Brad Fuller!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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