How does a black chick tell if she's pregnant? When she pulls the tampon out, all the cotton is already picked.

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1 friend request facebook: ignore. Nuff said

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some people say that i am gay they are right cause i like boys

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A man goes and buys a head of cabbage. The cabbage had a worm in it. When the man saw the worm, he threw out the cabbage and bought a new one the next time he went to the grocery store.

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Why did the little boy throw his clock out of the window? After hours of searching for the snooze button to no avail, the little boy became so irritated at the incessant ringing of the alarm that he threw it out of his window in a fit of rage. The clock landed on an old woman who was walking twenty stories below. She was immediately killed on impact.

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What did the bartender say to the black guy? hi there

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue.... I hate your guts.

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Why did the creeper not go home? Because his parents blew up. (As told by a 7 year old.)

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What's the difference between dead babies and the holocaust? A lot.

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whats funnier than throwing a baby off a cliff cathcing him at the bottom with a pitch fork

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My wife is going to the Caribbean Jamaica? No, St Lucia

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Why was the Cubs fan sad? His wife just left him.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because blind people aren't allowed to drive in the United States.

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How do you confuse a blonde? The same way you confuse a brunette or redhead, hair color has nothing to do with an individual's intelligence.

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when there's trouble lurking in your neighbourhood, who you gonna call? The local authorities.

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Who would win in a chess duel between Ender Wiggin and Artemis Fowl? Artemis Fowl will calculate the optimal path to move his pieces. Ender Wiggin will calculate the optimal path to kill the queen, so all the other pieces just sort of fall down.

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Three guys walk into a bar.....The fourth one ducks...

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What did Grandma give little Ben for Christmas? a wheelchair

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A biology teacher walks into a bar. "Ouch," he says. "I bet I just lost some brain cells. I wonder if any of them were going through mitosis..."

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A duct walks into a bar. The writer meant to write duck and then proceed to make a clever joke but instead a typo was made and a very unlikely occurence was writtern about considering air passages are not capable of walking and would most likely already be in the ceiling of the bar as too bring fresh air into the bar is important.

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how many jews does it take to screw in a light bulb? none their all dead.

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What do you call a fat kid with no arms and an eye-patch? Names.

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Q: How man Jews can you fit in a box? A:if your German than you tell me.

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Why isnt Gemma a Surfboarder? .. Because She was a Stillborn. Why isn't Kate a Ballerina? Because She's paralysed. Why isnt Tommy an Olympic High Jumper? Because He's a dwarf.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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