knock knock father: who's there? young man: it's I, your son. father: ....... what? young man: dad let me in, I'm sorry! father: i don't have a son.... young man: but.... i love you... father: get off my porch, my son is dead to me. (whimper, fading footsteps)

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knock knock who's there BANG!! BANG!! BANG!! BANG!! who OPEN THE DOOR ITS THE POLICE

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Guess what i just did. Master bait.

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when life givs you lemons, make lesbian porn

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Why did the man commit suicide? Because he felt he had nothing left to live for

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Why does the groom wear a black tux? Because he knows a funeral when he sees one.

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Q: Why was the little boy upset? A: His nose was glued to the sidewalk.

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roses are red violets are blue if i had a gun i would shoot you

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What's white and looks like paper? Paper

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Ross.

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Your mama's so fat.... Her cerial bowl came with a lifeguard

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What do you get if you put a horse in a blender? Dinner

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Osama bin Mohammed bin Awad bin Laden was born in Riyadh, Saudi Arabia, a son of Mohammed bin Awad bin Laden, a billionaire construction magnate with close ties to the Saudi royal family.

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What lumpy and pointy? A horny woman with breast cancer

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your momma is so fat she eats a lot of things

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What happened when a Black man ran into a white supremacist? They exchanged insurance information

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Why cant t-rexes clap their hands? They no longer exist

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Why was the mushroom invited to the party? Because the party was a rave and some mushrooms are know to make the consumer of them hallucinate wildly.

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Q: Why was the cook put in jail. A: He has killed 2 people and robbed several stores

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, i am in sex mode, why the F**k are you!!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side of the road because apparently their was something on the other side that appealed to the chicken. It was probably your mom.

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What would you call the fatty cranial mass surrounding a malignant tumor? Ted Kennedy's Head.

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What does andy and burger king have in common? Nothing, thats why she is now banging josh!

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I hate it when I try to put my gun on safety but I accidentally shoot u a school full of kid.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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