Why did the monkey ride a bike? Because he was taken from his natural environment, abused for years and forced to ride a bike.

One day a terribly epileptic child is put on on a strict Atkins diet by his loving mother. A week later he finds that the frequency and intensity of his seizures have been reduced by its ketogenic effects, which provides exogenous fats for the body to burn, but limits the available carbohydrate so that ketone bodies build up. It is the high level of these ketones which appear to suppress seizures.

God wrote this joke.................................

Why did the baby cross the road? 'cause i kicked it.

roses are red violets are blue i have shit in my mouth so screw you

Knock Knock Go Away

Why did little Jimmy cry when his Rolls Royce got destroyed? Because his parents were in it.

On monday morning the doctor walked into a patient's room, then he walked out after a quick check up.

A woman leaves the kitchen.

Casey Anthony kills a baby

What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into a worm and finding an apple.

Hello.

,try this on a girl, say "can I pop your cherry.........soda bottle cap off your cherry soda bottle?"

What is brown and sticky? A lot of things are brown and sticky

What did the walrus say to the Penguin. It said MAHHRGH. because walruses can't really talk

hey

Q: The girl fell for the guy, but the guy was sad about it, why? A: Because she fell off a cliff.

If you beat Chuck Norris in arm wrestling, you will be proud of yourself and he will go home with nothing.

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

Oh yeah? Well you're as gay as this joke!

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms Why didn't Sally get back up? She had no legs Guess who's getting prosthetic legs for Christmas! Not Sally.

At the time my grandfather came round to visit, what was happening in Australia? A giant spider was giving birth.

Q. What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the car? A. Robin, get in the car.

"I am proud to be black and I wouldn't want to be any other race." - Not racist. "I am proud to be white and I wouldn't want to be any other race." - Racist and offensive to black people "I am proud to be asian and I wouldn't want to be any other race." - Not racist "I am proud to be Ethiopian and I wouldn't want to be any other race." - Said nobody, ever

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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