I had a really funny joke about a dead baby...but I threw it out

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A man walked into a bar. He sustained a mild concussion and a brusied pelvis

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Always put punctuation at the end of your sentence

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If a chicken and a half layed an egg and a half in a day and a half how many pancakes does it take to shingle a roof? -A banana has no bones

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civil rights

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You know what's really long? The bread lines in Africa

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How would you rule?

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Not sure, its just a really rare combination, people tell me stuff like "oh they are really bright brown" like hell they are, I mean sorry but the hell they are. I prefer it the way you say it, they are red, really really red, and you do not say it as if I had something to be ashamed off.

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Your momma so stupid that it's really inspiring she managed to overcome her limitations and raise such a wonderful family.

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A man walks into a bar. He has suffered from a concussion and is now in the emergency room.

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Knock knock Who's there? Boo Boo who? It's just a joke you don't have to cry about it

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GADZOOKS!

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Butt poop.

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Why do black people eat so much fried chicken? Because it's delicious!

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What's black and is as fast as a car? A black car.

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Did you know, even though penguins ARE birds... They don't live in volcanoes?

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Two guys walk into a bar; A Mexican and a Canadian. The Mexican guy says "Bartender, give me a 2 shots of Tequila, por favor". The Canadian guy says "Bartender, give me a shot of Club and a Molson, eh". They continue to drink until neither can feel the crippling pain of their mundane lives - then they each leave the bar, walk home and sleep alone.

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why did helen cellars dog runway. you would to if ur name was ujujujujjujujujujujj

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Knock knock? Who's there? Why don't you answer the damn door and find out for yourself?

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Why did the black man sleep all day? He suffered from narcolepsy.

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Why did the dude fall into a box? Because he was hit by a bus.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Frank. Frank who? Cut the shit, I'm being chased by a tiger!

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What did the dinosaur and John Wayne say to the Easter Bunny? Nothing, they're both dead and the Easter Bunny isn't real.

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Knock knock. Who's there? The police, your family is dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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