Whats better than having 5 dollars? Having 5 dollars and a pizza

Whats long hard and full of semen? A dick.

What did the wall say to the floor? Nothing.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding two worms.

a blond, a brunette, and a redhead are stuck on top of a mountain. they freeze to death and the rescue team discovers their frozen bodies two days later.

Why did the midget cross the road? He needed to buy a ladder

What's sad about 4 black people in a cadillac going over a cliff? It was my cadillac

Chuck Norris gets punched in the face.

A man spots Bill Murray at a restaurant in Los Angeles. He proceeds to tell his friends the story, who in turn believe him, as the story is plausible.

What's worse than kissy face pictures on facebook? The porn pictures on facebook.

Why is it as hot as the sun? Because it is the sun

why doesn't mexico have an olypics because theyre already running,swimming and jumping over the border

once there where 3 guys on a beach. they found a bottle and a fetis came out.. later they found out 2 of the 3 had cancer and the 3rd was a vegetable.

whats the difference between a thousand dead babies and a porshe? i dont have a porshe in my garage

Why can't Ray Charles read? Because he's dead

What do you call a girl with no arms and legs? Whatever her name is.

why did the kid cross the road he didnt he had no legs

Billy and Jeff wanted to go on an adventure so they planned a safari in Africa. Everything was going as planned until they were in a sticky situation: whether to cross a narrow bridge above the crocodiles or not. Billy tells Jeff "Hey whats the worst thing that can happen?" Jeff was diagnosed with cancer and died the next morning.

everybody loves raymond

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

Knock, Knock, Who's there? The IRS.

What did the man say when an pterodactyl flew into the kitchen while he was having breakfast? Huh, that's strange.

How many black people does it take to complete the simplest task such as washing their own hair? A **** load! thats why slavery was so populer back in the day. (and gays were big then to because they had to shower together to remember to wash their hair).

What do you get when you throw a bagel at a chicken? One less bagel.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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