Sticks and stones may break my bones, But words can leave deep psychological wounds that may never heal.

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why did the man beat his wife because he was mean

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Yesterday I told a chemistry joke. There was no reaction.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a cucumber

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What looks like half an Apple? The other half.

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How many dead babies can you fit in a bath tub? 27

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A duck walks up to a lemonade stand. He didn't say anything because ducks can't talk.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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A boy walks up to a girl and says "Do you like ice cream? Cuz I have a huuuuuge penis."

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The sentence at the bottom is true. The sentence at the top is false.

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What's white and sticky? A white stick.

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what has two legs and is red all over? half a cat

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An irish man walks out of a bar

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Lady wanna go out sometime? Im not lesbian girl! Im not a girl... OUCHIE!

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Emergency call: - Please help, my little son swallowed a condom! 5 minutes later - It is ok, I found another one.

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Mitt Romney

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what's the difference between a crocodile?

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What did little Timmy get his grandmother for Christmas? A coffin

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My did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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What's worse than finding a holocost in your apple. A truck full of dead babies then what's worse than finding a truck full of dead babies in your apple. Braving to pich fork them out

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How do you know an elephant has gotten into your refrigerator? The refrigerator is lying on its side and the door is ripped off. The food is all over the place and the shelves are scattered around the floor. Your house will have suffered severe structural damage that insurance plan might not cover. Also there is a mortified elephant in you kitchen.

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What do you call a dead, black child? Dead.

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Did you hear about the guy who did a backflip off the cliff? He died

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What is E.T. short For? So he can fit on ship

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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