Why do vampires drink blood? Maybe if they existed you could ask one.

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How many lightbulbs does it take to screw in a dyslexic men? 25

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Whats cooler than being cool in High School? Nothing, now take a hit...everyone's looking

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Why was the blonde in the bathroom for 2 hours. She had to pee really bad.

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that awkward moment when your teachers a duck

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What's the Chinese guy's favorite color? Blue.

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There are 11 people hanging onto a rope that comes down from an airplane. 10 of them are blonde, and one is a brunette. They all decide that one person should get off because if they don't, the rope will break and everyone will die. No one can decide who should go, so finally the brunette delivers a very touching speech, ending with the words, "I'll get off." The blondes, all moved by the brunette's speech, start clapping. Problem solved.

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Why did the Koala fall out of the tree? It got hit by a stone. Why did the second Koala fall out of the tree? It was hit by the first Koala. Why did the third Koala fall out of the tree? It thought it was a game. Why did the Kangaroo die? It was hit by three falling Koalas.

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out of your comfort zone

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Q. whats red and sits in a hairdressers? A. a baby getting its hair cut with a potato peeler

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What do you call a baby with no future? A baby dying at birth.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was stapled to a deer

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What is pink and fluffy? Pink fluff

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Why is six afraid of seven? Because seven killed all of six's family

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Why does the easter bunny hide his eggs? Because he wants to hide the fact he knocked up a chicken.

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what is the germans word for fat dick what is very fat hairy dick

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How do you make a plumber cry? You kill his family.

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How do you sink a Polish battleship? You breach the hull.

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who can beat up superman doomsday, duh, he killed him

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he clearly has an owner that doesn't fence him in.

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What did Helen Keller say after the Iron Maiden show? Nothing, she is a mute.

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why did the chicken cross the road it was being chased by the man from the chicken slaughter house.

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Q: What starts with "P" and ends with "orn"? A: Popcorn Q: What starts with "F" and ends with "UCK"? A: F'uck you -Ap

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What do you call a mix between a mexican and a octopus? Actually, at this moment in time it is physically and morrally impossible to do such a thing. Scientists have yet to find a way to split the genes and create a cross species. lol jk its called a moctapus.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops