a cat and a duck walk into a pub. the cat enters first and says for the duck to put all of their drinks on his bill. the duck(being a duck)says nothing because ducks cannot speak. therefore the cat shouldnt have been speaking either.

what looks like a bananna but is blue a blue bananna

What did God say when he made the first black person? I have just added a significant element of diversity to the human species. Intolerance between ethnicities will surely prove to be an obstacle in societal progression, creating hardships for many. I know this because I am God.

Q: Why can't a tomato fly a plane? A: Cuz it's a tomato

What's worse than a bee sting? Two bee stings! What's worse than two bee stings? The Holocaust What's worse than the Holocaust? Adelle....

Two blondes get in a taxi. Who's driving? The taxi driver.

Why did the black homeowner declare bankruptcy on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by continuing to pay his mortgage bills.

A Tatooine moisture farmer, an old man, an astromech droid, and a protocol droid walk into a cantina at Mos Eisley Space Port. The bartender says, "We don't serve their kind here! They'll have to wait outside. We don't want them here." The moisture farmer then says to his droids, "Listen, why don't you wait out by the speeder. We don't want any trouble."

what did the pizza say to the bread? nothing pizza cant talk

What do you call a Christmas tree with lights on it? A Christmas tree with lights on it.

A child walks into a classroom.

Haiku's are easy, But sometimes they don't make sense. Refrigerator.

Roses are red violets are blue I have boobs and so do you

What happened when Sally got hit by a truck? WHO CARES CALL 911!!!!

Bill:What do you get when you cross a panda and an eagle? Joe:I don't know what? Bill: Is that even possible?

how many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop 1027

whats polish and black a polish black person

A dog is always in the pushup position.

Why does Santa Clause say Ho Ho Ho? He has Tuberculosis.

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

What's the difference between a hippopotamus? An orangutan.

What's worrying about a middle-eastern man on a plane? The fact you are worrying about it.

guy walks into a bar.... Ouch.

And more;

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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