What did the man do after he rented a movie? He watched it

thumb_up thumb_down +22

A priest walks past a mailbox with the number 666 on it. Nothing happens, because it is an ordinary mailbox.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why were the black man's balls so big He had testicular cancer

thumb_up thumb_down +22

A mouse sniffed a peice of cheese. It was on a mouse trap and then it died in the trap.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What do you call a person who dies in march A dead person

thumb_up thumb_down +20

what do you call a nun in a wheel chair? Virgin Mobile By: jb lshs

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Why was the blonde sent to prison? Well there could be a number of reasons, but I for one do not know this specific blonde so I can not help you.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Aodhan peanut head Hearty

thumb_up thumb_down +20

what du u call a aplle raisni in the hotr sun? graep duahahahahahahejejejejejejahahahejejejwyan

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Q. What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the car? A. Robin, get in the car.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

How many black people does it take to screw in a light bulb? I don't know, that's why I was asking.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Two Jews walk into a bar. They promptly order their drinks and then leave.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Jason Connor.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Roses are red Violets are blue I like you Get in the van

thumb_up thumb_down +20

who's a slut... you're mom

thumb_up thumb_down +20

" ding dong " person in side: wait aren't u supposed to knock knock

thumb_up thumb_down +20

How did the man with no legs get around? He was assisted by a nurse or relative who was kind enough to take on such a task.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

How do you unclog a toilet? You call a plumber.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

The Christian Bible.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What do you call a mexican who steals toasters? A mexican toaster thief.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Three men are on a plane. (Note, that this is a low-altitude plane, in which they are allowed to open the windows) The stewardess offers the first man refreshments. He asks for an orange. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his orange, he throws it out the window. The stewardess moves on to the second man, who asks for an apple. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Also confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his apple, he throws it out the window. Finally, the stewardess moves onto the third man, who asks for a bomb. Without question, the stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. With no reaction, the man receives the bomb, then throws it out the window. Upon landing, the first man sees a woman crying. With a sympathetic heart, he asks what's the matter. She replies, "I was walking down the street, and an orange came from the sky and hit me in the head." The man brushes the event off as a coincidence. The second man sees another woman crying. Upon asking her what's the matter, she replies, "I was walking down the street, and an apple came from the sky and hit me in the head." The man, confused, apologizes and walks away. The third man sees an officer standing on a street corner and a pile of burning rubble behind him. He asks the officer what happened and he replies "A bomb fell from the sky and annihilated the city orphanage. 214 children were killed and two nearby families of 3 and 6 were severely injured and are now in the hospital with no hope of survival." The man was found dead later that week with a self-inflicted gunshot wound to the head.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Q: What's worse than a dead baby? A: A dead baby with diarrhea.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

what do you say to a girl dog crying??? shut up bitch...

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Why was the pig sweating? It wasnt, because pigs have adapted by using behavioral thermoregulation, which is the act of cooling themselves in the mud or water.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops