Do you want to hear a joke?!?!?!?!?!?! A happy orphan

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I have a fetish for sniffing your shoes.

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rose's are red, bananas are yellow, yo mama's so fat she jiggles like jello

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fruit salad?

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Why did the chicken cross the street? To get to your house. Knock Knock Who is there. The chicken.

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You ask a German how long it takes to go from Berlin to Amsterdam. He replies, ''About four hours by tank."

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A horse walks into a bar and doesnt order a drink. Because he cant.

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There where ducks sitting in the bath One Duck truns to the other an says "could you pass me the soap" The other duck truns and replies "dont call me toast"

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Misner is a twat.

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Why is Helen Keller a bad driver? Because her inability to see or hear makes her an extremely dangerous road hazard.

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to get to the other side.

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how big is the moon? why the hell are you asking me?...dumbass.

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If you have ten apples, and I take away three, then you will only have seven apples left, because ten minus three is seven. On the other hand, if I have a hundred apples, and you take away ninety-six, then I will call the police on you because that is stealing and it is not allowed.

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why did the chicken cross the road? because the chicken had enough of life and wanted to commit suicide due to recent tragic events such as his cheating wife, his druggie son, his prostitute daughter, losing his home, and getting fired

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A teenage girl walks into a dark alley. She emerges on the other side completely unharmed.

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What happened to the boy with cancer? He died.

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Why isn't pluto a planet anymore? Nasa decided it was too small

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8

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what did the little boy get from santa claus on christmas? nothing santa isnt real

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Why did the duck eat the chicken noodle soup? The duck was told that if he ate the chicken noodle soup on Fear Factor he would win $10,000. What he failed to realize was that he forgot to sign page 16 on the episode contract and did not win any money and was sued by Campbell's soup for copyright infringement.

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River Ravi flows in which state? Liquid state.

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Why does Michael J. Fox make the best milkshakes? Because he uses only the finest ingedients.

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What do you call a person rolling down a hill, in a burning car, with a pack of wolves running after him? DEAD!

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Daisies are green, poppies are white, I have a headache.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops