Knock Knock Come in. Thanks.

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Q: What do you call a kid with no arms and an eye patch? A: His name.

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Why is the sky blue? Because bicycles have two tires

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What's the difference between a dead dog lying in the middle of the street and a dead black man lying in the middle of the street? The physical differences you would commonly expect to be between a human being and a dog.

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What do a worm and a human have in common? They both have arms and legs apart from the worm

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There was a hundred dollar note lying flat on the ground. The homeless guy didn't pick it up and walked on because he didn't see it.

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Why do people eat babies? Because they're delicious.

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Why was the black girl happy? She got a raise.

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What would Martin Luther King Jr. do if he was alive today? Scream at the top of his lungs as he tried to punch out the top of his coffin.

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What do Connecticut school kids get at Christmas? Shot.

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how do you fit 100 babies in a bowl? with a blender. how do you get them back out of the bowl? with tortila chips.

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why didnt Timmy get anything for Christmas?His mom told santa he was very naughty that year

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Jake was in trouble. He forgot his wedding anniversary. His wife was really angry. She told him "Tomorrow morning, I expect to find a gift in the driveway that goes from 0 to 200 in 6 seconds and it better be there!!" The next morning he got up early and told his wife to come to the driveway. His wife looks down and sees a scale.

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Steve Jobs Died today. So did 56 million other people.

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guy walks into a bar, ouch

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What did the midget say to the other midget? "We're midgets"

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Hey, I just met you And this is crazy I have alzheimer's Bacon

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When Chuck Norris plays Modern Warfare 2, he gets more care packages than Haiti did.

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Biggest lie ever; "I have read and agree to the terms of service".

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A boy asks a wolf, "whats the time mr wolf?" The wolf does not answer. Wolves possess neither watches, nor the neurone in their brain required to talk.

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what does a squid and a worm have in commen they both are animals

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Knock Knock. Whose there. We have a warrant for your arrest.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I can not rhyme, Show me your tits

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Why was the boy in hospital? He fell off the bus and was run over by many cars.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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