why am i a dick head. because my gcse's spelt fudge and i dont like fudge so i project my anger into boss things

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why did Helen Keller always ride in the passenger seat? so she could SUCK THE DRIVERS D!CK!!!!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why did the man suddenly burst into flames in room. The room was dark, so he lit a match. It turns out there was hydrogen in the room and when fire touches hydrogen, it sets on fire.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why did the guy get hit by a bus? He walked out into traffic.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Wow, so it is true, you are here the entire fucking time aren't you bitch? You and all "six billion of your followers of the dark", listen asshead, one thing is people asking ME when I FUCKING SIGN BOOKS (which does not happen all that FUCKING OFTEN!) Why I lead a fucking cult of sorts. Another one is having your goons stab me in the FUCKING EYE, and going "Oh I am like so sorry, please let me be the gayest I can be" People assaulting me because I use the "Moralman identity" IT IS MINE! My real FUCKING NAME IS NERO! I DON'T GO AROUND STEALING NOBODY`S SHIT!

thumb_up thumb_down -9

There's a Christian preist, Jesus, and a Jewish rabi on a boat. They want to go fishing, but they forgot the sunscreen, the bait, and the fishing line. The Christian preist walks across the water and goes and gets the Sunscreen. Jesus walks across the water and gets the bait. The Jewish rabi steps out of the boat and drowns. Jesus turns to the Priest and says, "Do you suppose we should have told about the underwater bridge?"

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why couldent the boy pick up the bunny? He had severe muscular distrophy, and couldent even lift a spoon to his mouth. let alone a bunny

thumb_up thumb_down -9

A Minister a Priest and a Rabi walk into a bar, they are not setting a very good example.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What's brown and sticky? A stick.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What starts with P and ends with O-R-N? Porn

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What's something that really sucks? Having a homicidal cat on your chest.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

One time at band camp, I advanced my clarinet skill, which led me to have a good life.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

gay people

thumb_up thumb_down -9

A woman walks into a bar.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What do you call a black man with gold teeth? Cruchie.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Roses are brown Violets are brown Who shit in my garden

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What is yellow outside, black inside, and makes you laugh when it falls? A school bus full of black people falling from a clif

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Jenny tried out for the school play. She got a callback the next day. Her father had died.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Two Jews walk into a bar. They have a lengthy discussion regarding the hardships their people have suffered throughout history. Eventually, the subject changes to which coffee franchise has the best blend. A clear, concise decision is never reached. They then are asked to leave the bar, as they have not ordered any drinks and the bar is for paying customers only.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

why is red the first color in the rainbow? I don't know go ask a scientist.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What's worse than finding a worm in you apple? The holocaust.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Knock Knock, Get the f*ck off my porch

thumb_up thumb_down -11

How many Mexicans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? The entire population.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why did the black man have to stand in the bus? All of the other seats were taken.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops