Oh you expected a funny joke? Oh well

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I win an iPad for pooping on someone's head Answer- We have a muddaf**kin winna

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What's the difference between a dead baby and an apple? I don't cum on an apple before I eat it.

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Barack Obama

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69

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How do you get a baby in a blender? Feet first so you can see the expression on it's face. How do you get it out ? Nacho chips!

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What's worse than watching 5 homeless men have an orgy? Waking up and having to clean the sheets

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? He threw it, because he had parkinson's!

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Whats the quickest way to a woman's heart? A bilateral incision on the upper left region of the sternum.

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Two muffins are sitting next to each other in the dessert. A hungry and lost man passes by and considered eating one of the muffins. Unfortunately he can't make a decision in time and took of in his 4-wheel drive. The next day a camel walks by and eats one of the muffins. The camel dies instantly, apparently the muffin the camel ate was poisoned. The now not so hungry and lost man looks at the dead camel and noticed the zoo is almost closing now. The man leaves in a hurry, to cook for his family.

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A young baby died.

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roses are red violets are blue i have a big dick unlike you

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Why was the little boy crying? Because a stranger shoved explosives up his butthole.

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What do you call a black man with a hoe? A farmer.

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What is red, blue, and green all over? A piece of paper with three colors on it.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I wouldn't consider Mark a chicken. In fact, given the high speed and volume of cars traversing that particular road in both directions, I'd say it was a ballsy move. In hindsight, though, he probably should have waited for the "walk" symbol to appear for pedestrians, in order to avoid being run over by a bus. Anyway, if Pastor John would like to say a few words before we finally put Mark's body to rest...

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How do you make Chuck Norris cry? Kill his family.

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if a tree falls in the forest does it make a sound? if a tree falls in the forest and it falls on a mime, does anyone care?

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Is it colder on a farm than in the winter?

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Whats Yellow and has arms. A lemon i lied about the arms.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It had the utmost desire to.

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What's more addicting than a good book? Meth

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Your momma's so fat that she has a body fat percentage of 37 and is clinically overweight.

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Pi = Pie, something everybody likes.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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