ive got it ive got ive got outsimers to tonight wow bim bim bub bub za za

Knock knock Who's there? 7. And if that's you in there, 6, you better start praying.

A man claims to own a talking dog. A skeptic approaches the man and his dog and asks for a demonstration. The man asks his dog, "How does sandpaper feel?" The dog says, "Ruff!" The skeptic is not convinced. The man then asks his dog, "Who is the greatest baseball player of all time?" The dog, who like all dogs cannot fully comprehend human speech, proceeds to lick his balls.

Roses are brown, Violets are brown, who shat in my garden

What's Mary short for? She's got no legs.

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in a pool The tragic drowning of a quadrapalegic

who is gay and sits next to me in my architecture class? James and austin!!!!

What do you call a bus filled with White, Chinese, and Black people? Public transportation.

the love boat

What has 3 legs? An abnormal human.

Q. What did the man say when his car broke down. A. Damn it, my car broke down.

Question: What did Mr. Reeves say. Answer: Nothing

I just farted, and now I have to Chit!

Two cannibals were eating a man, one at the top and one at the bottom. The cannibal at the top said, "are you having fun down there?" The cannibal at the bottom said, "yeah, I'm having a ball!"

What do you call a black guy who kills people? A murderer.

The joke below is absolute shit.

what did the blind deaf orphan get for christmas? cancer

Know what people hated the most? 9-11

A black guy and a white guy both get pulled over by a cop for speeding. The white guy is promptly released with a stern warning, whle the black guy is thouroughly questioned and has his car searched for drugs, with the probable cause being that the black guy has bloodshot eyes, reeks of weed and has a bong in his frontseat.

What's bigger then a bowling ball? What? Your mom!

What do you call a man with no arms or legs in the middle of a lake? Dead.

TIMMAH!

What did the farmer say when he didn't like his tractor? Man, i don't like this tractor

A gentleman walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "What can I get for you?" The gentleman replys that he would like a beer. After the bartender fulfils the gentleman's order, the gentleman drinks his beer and enjoys it.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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