Why would you ever buy an antijoke book? BECAUSE ANTIJOKES ARE F***ING AWESOME!!!

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Your mama is so stupid that she thought Brendan Fraser was a good actor.

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How do you stop moles from digging in your garden? Take the shuvel away.

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I win an iPad for pooping on someone's head Answer- We have a muddaf**kin winna

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How do you get a baby in a blender? Feet first so you can see the expression on it's face. How do you get it out ? Nacho chips!

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Why did the turtle cross the road? He was stapled to the chicken.

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Why did the koala fall out of the tree? It died. Why did the second koala fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first koala. Why did the third koala fall out of the tree? Peer Pressure.

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Barack Obama

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The Holocaust.

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What was so special about Anne Frank's diary? Nothing. ZeNaziGermanDoctor

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I hate all races.. Especially the 400 meter sprint

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Why was the black man escorted out of the bar? Civil rights is still a real issue in this country and must be solved.

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What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? One's fun to hit with a sledgehammer, the other one's a watermelon.

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What did the Egyptian helicopter do when it went into the pyramid? Exploded.

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Q: A jew and asian and a normal white guy walk into a resturan, who orders the cheapest meal. A: the Asian, its 1940 and the jews dead

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why'd the chicken cross the road? he didn't what kind of farmer lets their chickens out on the streets, they get crunk you know

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bergin y u so tubbbbbyyyy?????

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What do you call a joke without a punchline?

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What did my wife say when I asked her to pick up some milk on her way home from work? OK

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What is worse than getting stung by a bee? Watching your mother getting raped by your sister.

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Three men are on a plane. (Note, that this is a low-altitude plane, in which they are allowed to open the windows) The stewardess offers the first man refreshments. He asks for an orange. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his orange, he throws it out the window. The stewardess moves on to the second man, who asks for an apple. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Also confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his apple, he throws it out the window. Finally, the stewardess moves onto the third man, who asks for a bomb. Without question, the stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. With no reaction, the man receives the bomb, then throws it out the window. Upon landing, the first man sees a woman crying. With a sympathetic heart, he asks what's the matter. She replies, "I was walking down the street, and an orange came from the sky and hit me in the head." The man brushes the event off as a coincidence. The second man sees another woman crying. Upon asking her what's the matter, she replies, "I was walking down the street, and an apple came from the sky and hit me in the head." The man, confused, apologizes and walks away. The third man sees an officer standing on a street corner and a pile of burning rubble behind him. He asks the officer what happened and he replies "A bomb fell from the sky and annihilated the city orphanage. 214 children were killed and two nearby families of 3 and 6 were severely injured and are now in the hospital with no hope of survival." The man was found dead later that week with a self-inflicted gunshot wound to the head.

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josh roberts got the d in geog

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why did the computer crash? it didn't

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What sound does a childs head make in a vice? I don't know, I was too busy wanking.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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