A man with a badly injured arm is sitting in a hospital. He says, "Doctor, when my arm heals, will I be able to play the violin?" The doctor says, "Yes, with proper medical attention and rest, you will be able to." The man says, "That's great! Before I was hurt, I really enjoyed playing the violin."

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roses are red violets are blue heres the oven now where the **** is the jew

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How many arabs does it take to screw in a light bulb? One. We also have a black president.

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How many surrealists does it take to screw in a light bulb? Yarn

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Why did Sarah fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sarah!

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What is worse than 10 dead babies in a tree? 1 dead babies in 10 trees.

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Why did the little boy drop his ice-cream? He was run over by a bus and died instantly.

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My dog has no nose! Then how does he smell? Terrible!

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First speaker: "why are there so many anti-jokes about something walking into a bar!?!? Second speaker: "there are only a couple thousand of them." First speaker: "it is getting so damn annoying!" Second speaker: "Well, that's too bad for you" The first speaker proceeds in stabbing himself with a knife while laughing hysterecly. First speaker: "ha ha ha ha" Second speaker "emo."

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What's worse than a bad test score? Getting hit buy a train!!

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what do u call a long dik gay guy Gay Dickerson

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What did the cat say to the elephant? Meow.

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How many Mexicans does it take to change a light bulb? Probably just one.

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planned on writing you all an antijoke decided i wouldn't.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 6 witnessed while hiding in a closit 7 rape and kill his mother.

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What does DNA stand for? The National Dyslexic Association

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Q: Why did the bird fall out of the tree? A: It died. Q: Why did the snake fall out of the tree? A: It was stapled to the bird. Q:Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Peer pressure.

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What's brown and sticky? Poo.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.????????

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What's the difference between a freezer and a baby? A freezer doesn't scream when I pack my meat into it.

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what did the man with no arms and no legs get for christmas? a new hat

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Roses are red Violets are blue Your ugly

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What's worse than finding a worm in your Apple? Ebola

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Yo momma's so poor, that when she went to the soup kitchen, she got food.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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