i am an inbred jew who likes penis up my bum ~Nathan Barras

thumb_up thumb_down +50

How come Hellen keller is blind and deaf? Cause she is a women.

thumb_up thumb_down +50

If there are 3 apples, and Johnny takes away 3 of them, how many apples does Johnny have? None, because Johnny got hit by a train.

thumb_up thumb_down +48

My children are huge mistakes.

thumb_up thumb_down +46

why did the kid get a bad grade he didnt study

thumb_up thumb_down +46

whats the difference between a jew and a pizza? A: a pizza is a food that was created in italy and is regularly eaten daily around the world and a jew is a religion that is constantly criticized and made fun of because they are different.

thumb_up thumb_down +46

Did you hear about the Blonde who fell off a cliff You Have? Oh Ok, Have a nice day

thumb_up thumb_down +44

Q: Why did the bird fall out of the tree? A: It died. Q: Why did the snake fall out of the tree? A: It was stapled to the bird. Q:Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Peer pressure.

thumb_up thumb_down +44

What do you get when you cross a blonde with a dinosaur? Beastiality

thumb_up thumb_down +42

Why did the man have a curiously-shaped scar on his cheek? He had been mauled by an owl as a child.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

Yo momma's so poor, that when she went to the soup kitchen, she got food.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

*knock knock* "who's there?" "me, the person who knocked..duh"

thumb_up thumb_down +40

What did the farmer say when he couldn't find his tractor? Where's my tractor?

thumb_up thumb_down +40

What do a black man and an apple have in common? They are both carbon based life forms.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

How do you burn a lot of calories? Set a fat kid on fire.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

how do you make a door cry? twist its nob

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Q: What dosent a Jew and a pizza have in commen? A: The pizza dosent scream when you put it in the oven.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

In that case you are probably a bit of an outcast as most girls of your beauty are, you know, you are that kind of girl that feels weird because when she got/gets on the buss EVERYONE stares at her, but nobody dares to say anything, right? And when you are hanging out for a drink or something guys stare at you, and go like "nah" which means "Nah she is too good to want me" and starts hitting on your friends instead. Oh and you also get a lot of rude comments from guys "auto disqualifying themselves" like using complements they know will backfire like "Hey wanna fuck sugart1ts? They do this so they can go home with their ego intact thinking "Hey I was tough enough to hit on her, but she turned out to be a bitch! So does any of this sound familiar?

thumb_up thumb_down +36

so there are two muffins. no wait there are three muffins in an oven. actually it was a toaster oven. and they were covered in butter. uuuuuuuuuuuuuuhhhhhhhhhhh cheese on toast anyone?

thumb_up thumb_down +36

why did the black boy read a book. Because he had a book report due next week

thumb_up thumb_down +36

How many fingers does Charlie Sheen have? 8. and 2 thumbs. just like most everybody else.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Why did the Asian Cross the road? Because the crossing signal went green!

thumb_up thumb_down +36

How did the Jewish husband and wife stay together forever? They didn't. They ended up in divorce like 50% of all other married couples due to irreconcilable differences.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Why are there so many black basketball players? Because they aren't green.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops