Whats Yellow and has arms. A lemon i lied about the arms.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What's worse than the holocaust? anti-joke

thumb_up thumb_down +15

A man walks into a bar. I forgot the rest of the story but the punchline goes something something something something your mom is wwhore.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

A man walks through a doorway but there was a door there so he got injured

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What sound does a childs head make in a vice? I don't know, I was too busy wanking.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What battle did Napoleon die in? His last one.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What do you call it when Justin Bieber has sex with a woman? Intercourse.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

One day, a mother was speaking with her daughters. "Mommy," the first one said, "Why did you name me Daisy?" "Because when we brought you home, a daisy petal fell on your head." "Mommy," the second daughter said, "Why did you name me Rose?" ""Because when we brought you home, a rose petal fell on your head." "MMMBWWAAAAGGGH!" the last daughter cried. She was born with severe special needs and is incapable of coherent speech.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Oh yeah? Well you're as gay as this joke!

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Q: How much does it cost to have 50cent and Nickleback perform together? A: 45 cents, because its 50 cents, and you get a nickle back

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What did the Bishop say to the pebble? Wash my car

thumb_up thumb_down +13

If a quiz is a quizzical what is a test? A testicle

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What did the martian say to the other martian when he saw a fire hydrant? "Hey look, I found a fire hydrant!"

thumb_up thumb_down +13

how do you make a cat blink? strike him with a hammer.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What's sad about three black men driving over a cliff?

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Kid: knock knock Orphan: whos there? Kid: not your parents

thumb_up thumb_down +13

How are trees and friends alike? They are both subject to fall when struck with an axe.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why was six afraid of seven? Seven looked angry and had a gun.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did the boy only have one arm? tigers make terrible pets

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What did the hobo say while giving birth? bob come over here and hold my third leg for me??

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What's the difference between an elephant and a plum? Their color. What did Tarzan say when the elephants were coming? Here come the elephants! What did Jane say when the elephants were coming? Here come the plums! (She was color blind.)

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What lumpy and pointy? A horny woman with breast cancer

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Have you ever heard of Ethiopian food? Neither have they.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What is green and has wheels? Grass. I was just lying about the wheels part.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops