Yeah sure comment below, and soylent green is fucking people! Moral: "You are judging the spitting image of yourself, except that you are doomed to remain ignorant and judgmental"

What's the difference between a duck? One of its legs is both the same.

How did the girl with no arms fall out the window? I pushed her.

A black man named Lawrence was driving a car that wasn't his at 3 a.m. The car belonged to a drunk friend who asked Lawrence to be the designated driver.

You know what's funnier than 24? 25.

The joke above me is a wind-up, losers :P

How many potatoes does it take to kill an Irishman? None.

Why can't you fly? Cause Ruddell says so.

What is white on the inside and red on the outside? An apple.

Why can't Jimmy talk? He's dead.

modern love

A man walks into a bar... "Ouch"

What's brown and sticky? Fecal matter.

What do you call a black girl scout? A brownie

Q: What did the boy say to his mum when he saw a Lion A: Hey mum that's a Lion

How many wooden chairs can a black man staple to a whales forehead? 27 because Helen Keller does not like blueberries.

Why did the chicken cross the road? The chicken would greatly appreciate it if you stayed out of its personal life.

How many chairs does it take to screw a lightbulb? One, if you have enough lube.

What dud the baseball player do when he struck out? Walked back to the bench

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because Osama Bin Laden is dead.

1: Ask if I'm a truck. 2: Uh... Are you a truck. 1: No.

Why was the squirrel late for work? Because the traffic was nuts!

Your mother is so fat that when she steps on a scale it shows her a weight that she is not very satisfied with

Sorry not thinking here, of course I will arrive sooner, give me 20 minutes or so (got to scout the area, you never know) As for coding, there is no hidden meaning so yeah... That is probably some "Neronist" coding format I never knew of I am using so well. Cant drive like this, so I will use a cab and wait for you at the back seat or something, I will let the Taxi cab honk the numbers of code here so you can come out knowing its safe. I sincerely thought you where at the home, according to our coordinates you are... Dont tell me that bastard built some basement over there, wow! I really miss him now, if nothing else because I would have liked a wine cellar made in less than... Sorry, ill be there asap, 20 minutes or less, nah, believe me, "fancy" is the least of things I want, and I wont be changing my mind anytime soon. See ya. I am sincerely surprised you even remember me, then again I look a lot like your crush. Abel (in case you where wondering, this is not my name either, but you get the picture by now)

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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