Why did the fat man go to America? Because he was excited to get of work for vacation.

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i feel like when the radish was discovered someone was like "hey lets call it rad!" and another guy was like "lets dial it down a bit"

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A little girl had a sleepover with her friends. They watched a movie, then went to bed at a reasonable time. /

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What's the difference between a duck? One of its feet are both the same.

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What do a Penguin, and your best friend have in common? They'll both die if you shoot them in the head.

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There were 2 drunk men. Man 1:im planning to buy the world. man 2:you cant. man 1:why. man 2: cause im not gonna sell it.

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Why is America so great? Because the continent is really large.

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Q: Why can't dinosaurs talk? A: Because they are all dead.

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Your mom is so fat, every time she swims in the ocean, north america sinks because of the high water displacement caused by her giant body mass. (V1-V2=m)

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A wife asks her husband if he can fix the sink and he responds with Do I have plumber written on my forehead. Then she asks him if he can fix the porch and he responds with Do I have contractor written on my forehead. So the husband goes on vacation and comes back to find the sink and porch fixed and he asks his wife how it is fixed and she says that the new neighbor helped. So she says the neighbor said he would only do it for cake or sex. The husband respond by saying Which one did you choose. His wife responds by saying Do I have Betty Crocker written on my forehead.

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Two men walk into a bar, the third one ducks.

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Where do fat girls go to eat doughnuts? Jenny Craig

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How do you stop a clown from laughing? You hit it in the face with an axe.

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Steven hawking walks into a bar. a.w j.p

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How many blondes does it take to change a lightbulb? One. This task does not require over 1 person to complete.

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Why can't Jimmy talk? He's dead.

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What happens when someone with ADD tells a joke? I forgot.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He wanted a car to kill him so he can get to the other side with his wife and son. In other news,I had a very nice chicken cutlet and scrambled egg dinner.

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What happened to the blond that went to collage? She got her masters degree and became a brain surgeon.

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What did the blonde do at the WTC on 9/11? Die.

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Give me thumbs up!

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Why did Paul Walker cross the road? He wasn't wearing his seatbelt.

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What do you say to man with no hands. How do you feel.

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Wanna hear a joke? Twilight

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops