Getting up, the 2nd hardest thing in the morning.

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What's the difference between you and a mallet with a cold? Ones a sick duck...I forget what I was about to say but your mother is a whore

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A man walks into a bar... who cares what happens after that Charlie Sheen is winning and Osama Bin Laden is dead

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Whats the difference between a sandwhich and a dead baby? People eat sandwhiches.

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sometimes i wonder why is the frisbee getting bigger? then it hits me

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When life gives you lemons, you realise that life isn't a physical object and therefore you have problems. Have a nice day.

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I'm a boy... I like hamburgers... Xbox is my favorite activity.... I have a dog... My dad is cheap... He's my doctor, my dentist, and my mom... Haha get it?

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What's the difference between vanilla ice cream and vanilla ice cream with chocolate chips? Neither one has vanilla ice cream in it except for both of them.

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The man goes to the doctor after just losing his job. His house is being foreclosed because without the money from his job he can't afford to pay for his house. His girlfriend also just left him because of problems with money and she was looking forward to having a family and with him jobless it was just out of the question. Man:"Doctor I could really use some good news" Doctor:"You have aids"

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Why did the black kid with one leg read the Iliad? Because it was part of his homework assignment?

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Siete inglesi quindi non sapete nemmeno cosa c'è scritto ? Succhiacapre che non siete altro.

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Why didn't the skeleton go to the dance ?... because he was dead

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Q : whats the most annoying thing on the earth with a big fore head ? A : Paige

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Why does the gay person where a leather motorcycle suit? Because he drives motorcycles.

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Why was the ginger walking around in bare feet? He had no sole.

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Roses are red but violets arent blue!!!!!

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Membean

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why did ryan go to bed? because he is a growing boy and need it to keep in line for his study's i lied about him sleeping hes dead he was abducted

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What's funnier than my jokes? your face.

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- Hey, guess how many people are dead in that cemetery? - I don't know. How many? - All of them.

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How much booze did the homeless man drink? All of it. He is severely depressed.

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After finishing reading this sentence, read it again and you might or might not realise that there is a secret subliminal message in this sentence making you do something later tonight. Can you spot it?

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Roses are red Violets are blue I like to slap hookers

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What do you call a black man with a PhD and loving family? A nigger

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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