A wife asks her husband if he can fix the sink and he responds with Do I have plumber written on my forehead. Then she asks him if he can fix the porch and he responds with Do I have contractor written on my forehead. So the husband goes on vacation and comes back to find the sink and porch fixed and he asks his wife how it is fixed and she says that the new neighbor helped. So she says the neighbor said he would only do it for cake or sex. The husband respond by saying Which one did you choose. His wife responds by saying Do I have Betty Crocker written on my forehead.

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Quick its the weed hide the cops! ... wait...

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Why Can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's a woman.

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Whats the difference between a Mexican and a bucket of poop. The Mexican is a human the bucket of poop is an object filled bodily wastes.

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A blind man walks into a bar. And a table. And a chair.

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69 :)

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KNOCK KNOCK! Who's there? KNOCK KNOCK! Umm... Who's there? KNOCK KNOCK! OMG I SWEAR TO GOD WHO THE HECK IS THERE?!?!? KNOCK KNOCK! *opens door* Oh.... It was a woodpecker...

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Why did I kill the Muslim because I'm smart

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1st guy: Wanna hear a joke? 2nd guy: Yeah sure. 1st guy: Me too.

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What's silent but deadly? Limnic Eruption.

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Chuck Norris is so tough, he trained diligently for many years and is now a widely respected martial artist

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Printing billions of counterfeit dollars...in ones.

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jamie looks at jacob for arousment. jacob looks at his dog.........

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A man walks into a bar... "Ouch"

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A man walks into a bar stark naked with a duck on his head. The bartender said "Dave, what's wrong?" The duck replies "Don't ask."

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Why did Dolley Madison take the painting of George Washington out of the White House in 1814. It was on fire. By, Luke Atkins

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Chuck Norris once walked into a strip club, and had quite a nice time indeed!

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you lose.

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once upon a time there was a girl named katie. she walked across the road. she got hit by a truck. now she's in heaven. the end,.

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Why did you not just "put a spell" on her instead? And you are totally mean, ever actually killed someone?

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Thumbs this up

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Your Mama is so old, that she is probrably going to die pretty soon.

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knock knock... who's there? your grandmother, now please let me in it's very cold outside. *you now proceed to open the door for your grandmother as she is elderly and you dont want her to freeze

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Why did the fisherman die on a fishing trip? He had a heart attack.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops