what can you give to a millionaire to make him happy? sex

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How many Aumish farmhands does it take to operate a state of the art commercial laser-cutter? One,provided he has the relevant training and experience.

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How does a pirate get to work? His CAAAARRRR! Where does the pirate go after work? The BAAAARRRR! How does the pirate get home from the bar? A taxi. A pirate doesn't drive after consuming alcohol.

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Wy did the man fall? A tree fell on his legs!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It wanted to.

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I am not racist., I have a black man in my family tree! He is still hanging there

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luke moore cant pull it back

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What happened to the black man when he was eating a Tootsie Roll? He ate the entire thing but was still hungry due to the empty calories.

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What's worse than finding a worm in you apple? The holocaust.

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If the covalent bonds of two Hydrogen atoms and one Oxygen atom creates water, which subs are currently on the 5-dollar-foot-long menu at Subway?

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How do you stop a bus? You press the brake pedal, causing the brake pads to squeeze the tires. Which will slow the momentum of the bus to the point of stopping.

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What happens when you cross a kangaroo and an elephant? Absolutely nothing. The two belong to entirely different animal families and their reproductive abilities are totally incompatible. A kangaroo could never fertilize an elephant, or vice versa. To suggest anything else is unrealistic and a physical impossibility.

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when the teacher asked jimmy if he was a girl jimmy felt very scared because his teacher had no mental problems.

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What do Helen Keller and Stevie Wonder have in common? They're both well known figures who have inspired many.

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Why did the little girl fall out of the swing? Because she had no arms..

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The anti joke that repeats itself :(

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What do the words lightbulb and lightweight have in common? The word light is in both words. Other than that absolutely nothing.

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A baby gets hit by a bus.

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What can an elevator do that a mexican can't? Raise a family.

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What did the black guy do to his neighbor's car while he was away? Wash it for a for as a favor.

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Chuck Norris can count from 1 to 100... twice!

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James: They say attitudes are contagious. Bill: How do you know? James: My whole family caught it and they will all die within 2 weeks.

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What do you call a person with no legs playing soccer? A soccer player.

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Breanna baked a pie. what kind of pie was it? A JIMMY PAI

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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