3 men walk into a bar. The fourth one ducks. Thumbs up if you get it.

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i'm funny

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How many flies does it take to screw in a light bulb? Two. Question is, how did they get in there?

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I suck at poetry, Show me your tits.

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What has 3 legs? An abnormal human.

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Why did Jimmy through a glass at spouse? Jimmy was an abusive husband who had a tendancy to drink too much.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm dyslexic couldn't tell, could you?

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When is a Jew the sleepiest? Depends on the time really... some people sleep and wake up on different biological calendars.

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Knock Knock… Who is there? Orange. Orange Who? Orange you glad I didn't say banana? Actually I really wish you did, because I am Hypokalemic and am about to die you asshole.

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What do you call a man with 3 arms, 6 ears, 9 fingers, and a red clown nose? His name.

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My mom fell on our cat and it died.

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Why did the women knock on the door? she needed to do a shit

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What do you call an arab flying a 747? A pilot.

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What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? A watermelon doesn't scream when you cut it open.

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I walked up to my friend who's a drug addict holding a can of coke. I then told said friend that I liked the smell of coke. My friend then went on to snort 27 Kilos of cocaine.

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Have you heard about the Polish hockey team? They're not very good, but what they lack in skills they make up for in enthusiasm and good team spirit.

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How do you give Salley enough energy swim against the river current? Add your own electric current.

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How do u get a clown off of a swing? You hit him with an axe.

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Why did the kid drop his ice cream? He was hit by a bus

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An airplane crashes into a state park. There are no survivors. Susan continues her stroll in the park, considering she is blind, deaf and in a wheelchair, she isn't aware of the nearby disturbance

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Why do black people eat at KFC? Because KFC serves good food at reasonable prices.

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Q: What do you call a black guy with an air plane? A: A pilot you racist bastard!

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What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline. Notice how Anti-Joke MISSPELLED "user", writing "uses" instead. Probably most of you didn't notice until I posted this :)

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Roses are red. Violets are red. My thumb is red because I accidentally put it in the toaster.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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