A: Knock Knock. B:Who's there? A: The IRS and Child Protective Services

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How do you get Pikachu on a bus? Hide him under your coat.

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Yo mama is so fat!

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400 asian people walked in a bar

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Where was Sally when the bomb exploded? Everywhere.

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Do you know what does Wikipedia says about Elton John ? It says that Sir Elton Hercules John, CBE (born Reginald Kenneth Dwight; 25 March 1947) is an English singer-songwriter, composer and pianist. He has worked with his songwriting partner Bernie Taupin since 1967; they have collaborated on more than 30 albums to date.

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A horse walks into a bar, it gets a concussion. -mattobrado

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What would be the consequence of a terrorist detonating a 500 kT nuclear bomb in Manhattan? A ridiculous question. All enriched uranium in Pakistan is safe and out of reach of terrorists, their govt. has assured. Please ask about realistic scenarios next time.

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I am darkness, soon I shall rule the world, those of you that desire to serve me thumb this up, those of you that desire eternal fear beyond your imagination, thumb me down. Moral: Try thinking of me and thinking "he is crazy", in order to unlock the secrets behind spontaneous human combustion.

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Get in the car.

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why did the lion get lost? because the jungle is massive.

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Why does Marcus keep playing dumb games instead of doing his goelogy. No one knows.

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You copy and paster!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know your mother is a skank.

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When there's something weird in your neighborhood, who you gonna call? The police.

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I was in the middle of downloading a porno of two hot girls getting it on, my computer got a virus and crashed.

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In the attic lights Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Lights, voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic

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Q: Whats worse than the death of flappy bird? A: The holocaust.

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My Friday was going great until i realized it's Thursday...

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Why did the boy dress up as a zombie? Because it was Halloween.

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A homeless man comes home from work.

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Whats worse than dying? Nothing, really.

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Why did child's mom cry when he was born? The child had no head.

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A dog walked into a bar. The bartender barked at the dog and the dog replied with, "I don't speak dog language."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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