Mexicans are like waffles

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What do the Chinese call ping pong? Ping pong.

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A baby seal walked into a club.

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What's the difference between a pizza and a Jew? If you eat a Jew, you're deemed a cannibal and are frowned upon by the majority of society.

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Penis.

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Where was Sally when the bomb exploded? Everywhere.

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Q: Whats the difference between a guitar and a piece of ham? A: You can eat a piece of ham.

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April showers bring may flowers, may flowers bring pilgrims, pilgrims bring diseases, diseases bring death, death brings... Well it's just death.

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Why did the football player go to the bank? He had to make a deposit and refinance his home.

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A blonde is standing on the edge of a 20-story building. He's had a rather rough life.

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Why does Marcus keep playing dumb games instead of doing his goelogy. No one knows.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No. Neither has he.

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Whats even funnier than watching two black guys with guns attempting to shoot people Just about everything

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Roses are red, violets are blue, trains.

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What's funnier than killing a bunch of orphans? Pretty much anything is funnier than that. What's wrong with you?

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What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Stolen.

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I enjoy the fact that the jokes I post that do not make me laugh, are the ones that get zero thumbs, while those that at least make me smile, get at least a couple, I admit thought that its hard to keep track with me, I type jokes so fast that they disappear in the back before people can thumb them... Have you heard... Of the dog that was barking up the wrong three? The three said: Damn dog! I am not a tree! The dog kept barking, as dogs do not speak. Moral: Numbers speak fluently in most languages though...

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An Irishman walked out of a bar. A Frenchman was polite. An Englishman had beautiful teeth.

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You're a wizard Harry! I am?

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Why did the blonde laugh at the funeral? She suffers from autism, and doesn't understand when it isn't appropriate laugh. The mourners at the funeral, understanding this problem, ignored her and carried on with the service.

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-I once had a dog with no legs, and do you know how I named him? -...? -I didn't name him, he wouldn't come...

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what little black and can make a woman scream a womans dead roting baby

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. Why did the farmer cross the road? To pick up the dead chicken

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What did the homeless war veteran get for christmas? Nothing because we don't treat our veterans very well.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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