Knock Knock. Who's There? Jehovah's Witnesses.

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what did the dog do when he saw the flea?he ate it because he didn't know what would happen next

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What did the blind boy get for christmas? harry potter transcribed in braille so he could enjoy such a magical world like the rest of us

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How many lemons does it take to fix a lightbulb Lemons can't fix lightbulbs as the don't have a mind,heart or any limbs.Think about that crap.

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4 is half the number 8 is.

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Yo mama so fat she doesn't need news, shes worldwide. ~YN~

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obamas trench

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What do you call an Arab flying a plane over New York? The Pilot.

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Why is your face? Because.

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Shoes, socks, and mittens.

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Whats even funnier than watching two black guys with guns attempting to shoot people Just about everything

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? *cause 7 8 9? NO cause 7 was a nigga!

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When there's something weird in your neighborhood, who you gonna call? The police.

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Three Blondes were walking when they come upon some tracks. The first blonde says they're deer tracks. The second blonde says they're elk tracks. The last blonde says they're moose tracks. While they are all arguing about what type of tracks they are, they get hit by a train.

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Why did the one-legged chicken say déjà vu? It felt a strong sensation that the current event had been experienced in the past.

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Society.

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Three men are on a plane. (Note, that this is a low-altitude plane, in which they are allowed to open the windows) The stewardess offers the first man refreshments. He asks for an orange. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his orange, he throws it out the window. The stewardess moves on to the second man, who asks for an apple. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Also confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his apple, he throws it out the window. Finally, the stewardess moves onto the third man, who asks for a bomb. Without question, the stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. With no reaction, the man receives the bomb, then throws it out the window. Upon landing, the first man sees a woman crying. With a sympathetic heart, he asks what's the matter. She replies, "I was walking down the street, and an orange came from the sky and hit me in the head." The man brushes the event off as a coincidence. The second man sees another woman crying. Upon asking her what's the matter, she replies, "I was walking down the street, and an apple came from the sky and hit me in the head." The man, confused, apologizes and walks away. The third man sees a woman hysterically laughing. Intrigued, he inquires her jolly. She manages to state through her hysteria, "When me fart, me whole house blow up!"

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A man walks in to a wooden door. He's blind.

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knock knock who's there? roses are red, violets are blue, i shit in a bag and now its in flames on your porch

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Mexicans are like waffles

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What did the senile man say to the kids on his lawn? Tree dance the gator thong for my nipples.

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roses are grey violets are grey im colorblind but your face is still black!!!

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Why were the floors of the movie theaters so sticky? Spilled beverages.

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Why did child's mom cry when he was born? The child had no head.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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