knock knock who's there? roses are red, violets are blue, i shit in a bag and now its in flames on your porch

What do the Chinese call ping pong? Ping pong.

Why couldn't Carys answer the phone? - She had an ear infection.

Q: Why couldn't Katie ride a bike? A: Because she has leprosy.

What is Green and taste like an apple? An Apple

Why did the moron jump through the window?

Knock Knock. Who's There? Jehovah's Witnesses.

I was sitting in traffic the other day. I got ran over

Have you heard about the new German microwave? It's a great labour-saving appliance that cooks food much more quickly than a conventional oven

What does a turtle do on its back? NOTHING!

The Bible

What's worse than the Broncos losing the Superbowl? Your iPhone not working anymore

Roses are red. Violets are blue. I have short-term memory loss. And roses are red.

So once upon a midnight dreery.... In a galaxy far far away that takes place in the past but resembles a technologically advanced future, an evil sith overlord took an innocent Jedi knight and turned him in a cybernetic killing machine. In the end, he dies

What's the difference between a pizza and a jew? A pizza doesn't scream when you put it in the oven

A man calls his 23 year old nephew on a Saturday night. He's calling him, in order to apologise for molesting him when he was younger. As he could no longer live with the guilt and shame. They both start to cry on the phone. The nephew hangs up " I can't do this.." The man receives an email from his boss, saying " Lisa told me she's still waiting for your analysis on the new federal cuts and how they're going to affect us. Please send them asap."

So I was making this glass of milk right? So I get the milk out. And I get the soup out.. then I go...wait a minute...where'd the glass of soup come into this glass of situations? *smile+awkard pause because nobody will laugh at this=Success of this anti joke...try it*

Have you seen Stevie Wonders house? No, he hasn't either

Like CHUCK NORRIS, CHUCK NORRIS like You !

Why did the pirate fall off his ship? He got pushed off by another pirate

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know your mother is a skank.

Q: What is your name? A: I don't know.

Once there was a man, he was accused of false accusations.

^that joke's not funny

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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