whats red and can fall on you blood from a hunted duck.

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Yo mama is so fat!

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Whats worse than dying? Nothing, really.

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Joe Paterno dosn't walk into a police station.-South Park

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What's worst than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust.

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What's black, white and red all over? A zebra carcass

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A horse walks into a bar, and the bartender asks what will it be? Sarah Jessica Parker replies, i'll have 4 cosmopolitans for me and my friends.

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A panda walks into a restaurant, sits down and orders a sandwich. After he finishes eating the sandwich, the panda pulls out a gun and shoots the waiter, and then stands up to go. "Hey!" shouts the manager. "Where are you going? You just shot my waiter and you didn't pay for your sandwich!" The panda yells back at the manager, "Hey man, I am a PANDA! Look it up!" The manager's heart skipped a beat, and he locked himself inside his office, trembling with fear and confusion. Yes, it was plausible that a beast such as that could point to a random entry on the menu, and it was physically possible for it to pull the trigger of the gun (and, at such close proximity to the waiter, it would be pretty hard to miss him), but it was shocking and altogether disturbing to hear such an animal speak in human language, much less vernacular English.

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What's worse than repeating holocaust jokes? Repeating the holocaust.

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Three men sit at a bar. A clown walks in, so the first man says, "Oh, what fresh hell is this?", gets up and leaves. Then a fairy flies in, so the second man says, "Aw, hell no!", gets up and leaves. So the third man was alone with the fairy and clown.

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So once upon a midnight dreery.... In a galaxy far far away that takes place in the past but resembles a technologically advanced future, an evil sith overlord took an innocent Jedi knight and turned him in a cybernetic killing machine. In the end, he dies

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How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? They sent her to her room without dinner.

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Why didn't Joe have any friends? Because according to Thomas Hobbes man is anti-social by nature and therefore the only friends that he has are purely to reach his own ends and thus Joe cannot truly have friends in the sense that many use the word.

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Who has the biggest cock A rooster

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What do old people really like? Anal sex.

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Society.

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Q: Whats worse than the death of flappy bird? A: The holocaust.

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when the doctor asked him why he was sad andreas replyd i have a small penis and drew and devin keep making me drop the soap

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knock knock who's there? roses are red, violets are blue, i shit in a bag and now its in flames on your porch

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Knock knock ... KNOCK KNOCK ... I guess nobody's home.

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How do you get Pikachu on a bus? Hide him under your coat.

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You might be a redneck if you spent all day in the sun without sunscreen.

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What's the difference between an elephant and I?Our mass.

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What do you call an Arab flying a plane over New York? The Pilot.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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