What do you call an arab with a shemagh on his head and a gun A man who is concerned for his wellbeing and family

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What do you do when a elephant is sitting on your fence? You hit it with a fridge

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When there's something weird in your neighborhood, who you gonna call? The police.

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Q: How does Lady Gaga like her meat? A: Exactly what her preference is.

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A man walks out of a bar followed by the people he came with because they just announced "last call". The man is the designated driver for the night.

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It was a stormy night and a stinking boy was running away from the co-op, he was clutching onto his pocket and constantly looked over his shoulder.... panting the boy reaches for a rusty door handle he opens the door quickly and shuts it behind him. "mam i got tea" said the boy "thanks david we will eat tonight for once" said a big chinned pharaoh.

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Why did Jake not get on the bus? Answer: Because Jake is a dog. Dogs are not allowed on the bus.

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What is the oppisite of water? Dry!

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385

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An englishman, irish-man and a scotsman walk into a bar. Englishman orderds a pint of becks, Irishman a guiness and the Scot a whiskey. Everything is absolutely fine and nothing of even remote interest happens.

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What's the difference between a pizza and a Jew? If you eat a Jew, you're deemed a cannibal and are frowned upon by the majority of society.

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400 asian people walked in a bar

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Why did the black man shoot the white man? The white man was a prison escapee attempting to perform hate crimes toward African Americans by reforming the KKK. The black man was also schizophrenic.

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what do you get when you combine fire and water? alcohol

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Fags are gay.

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What do you call a black man selling drugs? average

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What does a baby sound like when put in the microwave? I don't know, I was masturbating.

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What is the difference between a pumpkin and a dead baby? There are thousands of differences between a dead human and the fruit of a pumpkin plant. One of them is that I didn't choke my wife to death with a pumpkin. Another is that pumpkins have a stem.

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Q: What is your name? A: I don't know.

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what do you tell a woman with two black eyes? nothing you already told her twice

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why did the lady take anti depressants? because she was depressed

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In an alternate universe, Jake Sulley's brother did not die. The human race proceeded to strip-mine Pandora of all its mineral wealth, and slaughtered the entire indigenous population.

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What do the pope and an orange have in common? They're both fruits. Except for the pope.

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Q: Why couldn't Katie ride a bike? A: Because she has leprosy.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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