Two men walk in to a bar, one buys a beer. The second receives a phone call and leaves.

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"Want to hear something ironic?" ...he said to the deaf man.

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Fred used to only visit his parents in the hospitals on weekends, because that was his only free time. Now his parents are dead and he has more free time.

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How do you scare a blonde woman? Tie her up and mutilate her family while she watches.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Get in the van.

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Honestly though bud, are you wasted? XD

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why did the holocaust not die because black people are scared of fuck

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Why couldn't little Jessica open the door? It was locked

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why did the chicken cross the road? Why not?

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Knock knock. Who's there? Banana. Knock knock Who's there? Banana. Knock knock Who's there? You're in-laws. Bet you wish I said banana

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One man's trash is another dyslexic man's shart.

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when a midget takes weed, does he get high or medium???

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knock knock who's there? to to who? to whom*

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Why did the man not want to be a tree? Because he didn't want to.

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What's one thing good about cancer? (make them guess) Nothing you fricking prick!

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Why is it that many lawyers have broken noses? Because they often have to interact with violent and distrustful criminals.

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I saw a woman get donkey punched in the middle of the street. Nero the clit collector: You know... What is it called when A donkey kinda lifts its front hoove and hits a woman? ...WHAT? DO YOU KNOW HOW MANY PEOPLE STARVE TO DEATH BECAUSE OF YOUR COIN COLLECTION? YOUR STAMPS ARE MURDER! (or something) At least my uh... "Friends" survive... SOMETIIIIIIIIMEEEEEEEEES!!!!!!! ...And then I kill them.

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What did the president say after his wife and kids left Him? Im Obama self now

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Why does mexico not have an Olympic team? They do

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I think people who go to see a psychiatrist need their head examining.

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What's brown, dirty, and smells like feces? Feces

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Why did the plan crash? Because the pilot was a potato

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That's what she didn't say

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A guy walks into a bar, but a metal bar, he hurts his head, he goes to the hospital to get an x-ray, Turns out he hard a brain tumor, He died the next day,

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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