There where ducks sitting in the bath One Duck truns to the other an says "could you pass me the soap" The other duck truns and replies "dont call me toast"

... i forgot the joke :p

Why are kenyans so fast? Because due to evolutionary changes, people from that area of the world have evolved to have superior muscle builds to sprint, hence giving them a natural advantage against an equally trained athlete form another part of the world with an equal skill level

A ginger a blond and a burnett where walking in the dessert... They died of heat exhaustion.

"Spell 'horse'" "H-O-U-Z-E" "No, that's incorrect. You failed the spelling test, you stupid fool."

How many Amish people does it take to change a light bulb? None because they don't believe in technology.

What did the skeleton say when he was horny? Nothing. Skeletons are not living and therefore cannot be horny.

It's easy to take part, just type your text below! no

Knock knock, Who's there? The cops, your parents are dead and now you are an orphan.

How can you spot a blind person at a nudist colony? They might be carrying a white stick, or have a guide dog or someone to help them navigate the premises.

I like my coffee like I like my women..... Without Hepatitis.

Q: How do you kill an Asian? A: Deprive of calculator or shoot it.

Why was 2 afraid of 3? Because 345!!!!!

Where do snowmen keep their money? Snowmen don't have money

Why can't Helen Keller drive? She's dead.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

Why can't Susie jump rope? Because she has no arms. Knock knock! who's there? Not Susie.

Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

She is so fast We call her Email Instead of Emily...

Why did the dog eat poop?

AIDS

A man walks into a bar. After several hours of drinking and loud unintellegable outbursts to those around him, the man wonders off to a nearby bus stop and relieves himself. He is now a registered sex offender.

A duck walks into a bar and the bartender says"What do u want?" The ducks replays "EVERY DAY IM SHUFFLING!!!" The bartender slaps the duck in its face and quid his job. The bar has a hard time finding a replacement and his business dies. THE END

Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the water? A: Bob.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...