A horse walks into a bar, and a man says "Hey, why the long face?" The horse calmly turns to him and replies, "Because I'm a horse you drunk moron."

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Why is six afraid of seven? Seven is a rapist.

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What is the difference between your mom and a cow? One is a 1,500 pound beast, and one is a human being.

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Why didn't Charlie Sheen lose? Because he's always winning.

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What's the difference between jam and jelly? Jam is slightly more viscous and may contain bits of fruit.

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What is worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Getting raped by a giant scorpion

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Where did Mary go when the bomb blew up? Everywhere.

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A guy walks into a bar what does he say? OW.

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A horse walked into a bar, the bartender asked "Why the long face?" The horse did not reply, as it was a horse and did not speak English nor understand what the man had said, the horse then stumbled around the bar for a while, confused, before finding the exit and leaving.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Seven was an identity thief.

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Trashcan!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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Why did the man have a bad day? Well first of all, his wife left him, then his two kids both committed suicide, then a large falcon pecked at him genital area. After that he proceeded to be hit by a car, and soon after he was hit by a bus. Following this, his corpse was raped by a transvestite pig, and then finally his spirit got hit by a plane on its way up to heaven, knocking it to Hell.

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wommmoaooammaaa

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What's funnier than the world ending? Ray Charles and Stevie Wonder in a staring contest.

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How many lesbians does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One, but she had a very muscular vagina.

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What looks like a chair but isn't? A picture of a chair.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? What's up. What's up who? The sky.

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What did the big chimney say to the smaller chimney? Nothing chimneys don't talk

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Knock, knock! Who's there? interupting little turtle interupting little tur... LITTLE TURTLE!

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A duck quacks in a mountain range. No one on or nearby the mountains hears the duck because ducks' quacks don't echo.

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What clicks when its out of lead ? A gun Why was the little black boy crying ? He ran out of that grape drank How do you make a dead baby float ? You take your foot of its head How do you know when your life is over ? When you start watching Twilight What is blue and sticky ? Blue Stick What do you get when you mix a dog and a cat ? Shit

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Nero, please cut the bull, I know you work for the feds, you are involved with the FBI, I know, but its not my problem, I just do not like you lying to me.

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A man says to a woman, "hey, bitch, shut your fucking mouth you goddamn hooker." Most hookers are used to it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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