Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because a tree fell on her. Knock Knock Who's There? Not Sally...

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Why did the redneck ask his daughter to get on her knees? His shoe was untied.

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When life hands you lemons, you should question your sanity

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What drink is dark yellow and freshly squeezed from one of the most healthy snacks? Piss.

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Why did Jake have a bad spring break? Because he got hit by a car and died

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What do you call a black man who goes to college? A scholar.

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Your mother was a hamster, And your father smelt of ElderBerries!

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How do two blondes stay alive at the bottom of a pool for 30 minutes? They don't and they died.

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I haven't made a school shooting joke yet, but the day is young Just like those kids that got shot

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What stands on the corner oof every major city at night? A cop

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whats 2+2? math.

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"You've got a lot of C in your body." said the doctor. Jimmy replied with glee: "Ah that's great news, vitamin C is.." "No you've got Hepatitis C, you'll be dead within a month."

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A man calls 911 911: hello? Man: sorry wrong number.

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A black man walks into a bar. The bartender says "I wont serve you." The black man says, "Why? Is it because of the color of my skin?" The bartender says, "No, its because your wearing a suit and on the front door it says no people in suits are allowed." So the black man took off his suit and was kindly served.

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Why was Sally crying She got a high five In the face With a chair

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How do you stop your child from picking his nose? Cut his hands off

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Why did 3 blacks guys start watching the first Star Wars movie on Saturday night? They finished the Back to the Future movies on Friday.

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Am I a cat? No, I am a human; cat's cannot type.

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What's the biggest difference between white and black people? the melanin levels in their skin.

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Take off your shoes.

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Where can find a man who owns a white van capable of transporting many children? Most local churches have them for mission work. I would contact a local minister.

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Two cows are standing on the top of North Pole and in a half-inch wind they're spanking a bottle of coconut jam. Suddenly two infrared gallopping fly past them. What's the consequence? That people shouldn't use freshly peeled lemoncakes on underwater cornfields.

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Why couldn't little Johnny play sports like the rest of the kids? He was diagnosed with polio at the age of 3 and has limited use of his legs.

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what did you call a bench full of white guys? The NBA

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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