Once there was an ugly barnacle. He was so ugly that everyone died. The end.

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Why did Justin Beiber fall out of a plane? Because i pushed him off

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How many Aumish farmhands does it take to operate a state of the art commercial laser-cutter? One,provided he has the relevant training and experience.

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whats are the similarities between a dolphin and a bus? they both have wheels, aside from the dolphin. it does not,

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Why doesn't Rosa Parks eat bacon? Because she's dead.

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So this old redneck is sitting on his porch when he sees this boy walking down the road and hollers "What you got there boy?" "Chicken wire." "What you gonna do with that?" "Gonna catch me some chickens." The old guy thought: Dumb boy. You can't catch no chickens with chicken wire. Later that evening he sees the same boy walking with a bunch of chickens. The next day he sees the same boy walking with duct tape. "What you got there boy?" "Duct tape" The boy replies. "Gonna catch me some ducks." The old man leaned back and thought. "Dumb boy, you can't catch ducks with duct tape." Later that evening he sees the boy walking with a bunch of ducks. The next day he sees the same boy and hollers: "What you got there boy?" "I got me some pussy willow." The old man hollers: "Hold on, let me get my hat."

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Why did the chicken cross the road? 42

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What is the most dangerous day of the week to leave the house? Garbage day. Moral: Or rather GAAAAAAAAAARBAAAAAGE DAAAAAAAAAAAAY! *BANG BANG BANG* >:D

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Roses are red Violets are blue i got one question Screw You

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Who lost World War II? The Jews.

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your moms soooooo FAT that she went on a diet and became really sexy

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first one. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Monkey see, monkey do.

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What did the bartender say to the black guy? hi there

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What's 21 and pregnant? Ariana Grande

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Q. What do you tell a women with two black eyes? A. Stop pissing him off!

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if a man is alone in the forest, and there are no women around to hear him...........is he still wrong?

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Five Mexicans were driving down the motorway in a Ford. Must've been a Fiesta.

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whats black and goes to newy high Manyiel

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An Indian child is born with three arms. After being ridiculed his whole life he kills himself at age 19.

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Yo momma so fat, she died.

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How do you like your eggs in the morning? -Poached or Fertilised?

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What's funnier than a dead baby? Everything.

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I LIKE TRAINS

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What do you call a dog eating a dead dog? A hungry dog

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops