The man goes to the doctor after just losing his job. His house is being foreclosed because without the money from his job he can't afford to pay for his house. His girlfriend also just left him because of problems with money and she was looking forward to having a family and with him jobless it was just out of the question. Man:"Doctor I could really use some good news" Doctor:"You have aids"

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Roses are red Violets are blue This poem makes no sense FIRETOE!!!

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When your scuba diving why do u jump off backwards beacause if u jump forwards than u witll still be in the boat!!!!!!

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What is funnier than onion gravy? Mushroom gravy.

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What do you call a black man with a PhD and loving family? A nigger

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Q: Why is my friend gay? A: Because i slept with him.

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What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? One splatters and makes a big red mark on the ground when dropped from a building. The other is a fruit.

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Guy 1: why are you such a douche? Guy 2: cause douches get the most p***y

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What did the serial killer eat for breakfast? You.

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I like big butts and I cannot lie. You don't know that. I may enjoy skinny butts. I may be lying.

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But one McDonalds Happy Meal for the price of two, and receive another McDonalds Happy meal absolutley free!

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What is worse than going to school without your homework? Going to school naked without your homework.

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What is black, white, and red all over? A penguin in a blender.

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What does a Chinese girl get for Christmas? New parents...

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Why did Santa's little helper feel depressed? Neurotransmitters essential for happiness, such as serotonin and norepinephrine, were in rather low supply in the poor elf's brain.

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Why didn't Little Timmy's parrot talk? It's neck had snapped.

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Why is it impossible to travel faster than the speed of light? Because it travels pretty darn fast.

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I like the way he thinks. Too bad he has alzheimers.

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--Knock Knock Who's there? --Banana Banana who? --Knock Knock You just said that --Sorry i have Alzheimer's

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Why can't vegetarians eat mushrooms because I can't urinate over a scotch bonnet :/

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what does a man with no leg say to a woman with one eye? hello. by Mad James

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What's worse than stubbing your toe? Nothing.

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A son went to ask his father about his thoughts on abortion. "Dad, what do you think about abortion?" "Ask your sister." "I don't have a.."

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What's worse than the holocaust? I'm a zebra so what is the holocaust.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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