Ask me if I am a cat. Are you a cat? No, what kind of stupid question is that?

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Why doesn't Helen Keller drive a car? Because she's dead

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being shot repeatedly in the chest.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was black.

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JUSTIN BIEBER IS A FAG

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Q. Why can’t a teacher lift weights? A. Because, most teachers are women and most women do not enjoy It.

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Yo mama is so stupid, she has a sub-par intelligence quota.

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Apple.

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An Irishman walked out of a bar. A Frenchman was polite. An Englishman had beautiful teeth.

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2 men walk into a bar. The first man proceeds to fall on the ground and let out a string of obscenities, obviously in excruciating pain. The second man, fearing that he may have suffered some sort of concussion, immediately goes to his doctor and gets checked out. He is still awaiting results.

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A teenage girl walks into a bar and orders an alcoholic drink. The bartender declines the order as she is under the legal age of purchasing and consuming alcohol.

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Why did the little boy fall off the swing? He had no arms.

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What do you get when you cross a turtle and a cheetah? A fictional animal.

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A: Knock Knock. B:Who's there? A: The IRS and Child Protective Services

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What did the Neo-Nazi say to the Jew? Hello.

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Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Nobody, because first, pineapples are too small to fit in, and second, you would drown.

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Chuck Norris is so strong, he can lift really heavy things without hardly even trying.

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Friends are like snow: If you piss on them, they disappear.

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How do you know that god was a male? You don't, that's why it's called faith.

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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Guess what? what. You guessed it!!

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Why did the black man shoot the white man? The white man was a prison escapee attempting to perform hate crimes toward African Americans by reforming the KKK. The black man was also schizophrenic.

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Why did the cow jump over the moon? He cant jump over the moon due to low gravity

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Actually 6 wasn't afraid of 7 because numbers have are not living things, therefore have no consciousness or emotions, meaning that numerical digits can not have a fear or be afraid of another number.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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