Bob fell off his roof.

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The man who killed hitler must have ben a swell dude a.w. j.p.

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A homeless man comes home from work.

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Roberto: Did you watch that WNBA game tonight?!? Will: No Roberto: Me either

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A horse walks into a bar, it gets a concussion. -mattobrado

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4 is half the number 8 is.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. The chicken got crushed by a fridge.

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69

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"Ask me if I am a Lemon?" "Are you a Lemon?" "Yes, ask me if I'm an Orange" "No, I'm a Lemon."

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What do you get when you sunflower? Vegan turtles.

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Why do vampires suck the blood of their victims? Because blood is very nutritious and provides more iron for heamoglobin.

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Why did the one-legged chicken say déjà vu? It felt a strong sensation that the current event had been experienced in the past.

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what do you tell a woman with two black eyes? nothing you already told her twice

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In the attic lights Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Lights, voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic

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What did polyvore say to wanelo? Nothing They are apps

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A black guy and a white guy walk into a bar, they were both unemployed and blowing their savings on their alcohol addictions

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Why did Suzy's neck hurt? Because it was broken

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A: Knock Knock. B:Who's there? A: The IRS and Child Protective Services

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Yo mamma's so fat, she should try NutriSystem.

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Ask me if I'm a flower. Are you a flower? No.

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What did the senile man say to the kids on his lawn? Tree dance the gator thong for my nipples.

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Why did child's mom cry when he was born? The child had no head.

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What's worst than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust.

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It's a bird! No it's a plane! No you idiots, it's only a cloud.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops