Stephen Hawkings walks into a bar. Everyone is amazed because he can now walk.

Ask me if I am a tree Are you a tree? No.

Why did the little boy fall off the swing? He had no arms.

when the doctor asked him why he was sad andreas replyd i have a small penis and drew and devin keep making me drop the soap

A baby walks into a bar, the whole bar applaudes for the baby boy who just took his first steps.

I like my women like I like my coffee. Without a penis.

Friends are like snow: If you piss on them, they disappear.

Why did the disabled man fall of the swing, someone shot him.

Q: What's funny about prostitution? A: Nothing. It's a widely misunderstood profession.

Three men sit at a bar. A clown walks in, so the first man says, "Oh, what fresh hell is this?", gets up and leaves. Then a fairy flies in, so the second man says, "Aw, hell no!", gets up and leaves. So the third man was alone with the fairy and clown.

Have you heard about the new German microwave? It's a great labour-saving appliance that cooks food much more quickly than a conventional oven

Yo mama so fat she doesn't need news, shes worldwide. ~YN~

Get in the car.

Why does Marcus keep playing dumb games instead of doing his goelogy. No one knows.

Why did the chicken kill itself? To get to the other side.

Why didn't the skeleton go to the party? He had heard from a mutual friend that his ex-girlfriend, who he had recently broken up with, would be present at the same party and to avoid an awkward encounter he chose not to go.

Why am I losing my time writing this joke even knowing that I will get lots of thumbs down?

Why cant the white man dunk? Because he lost his legs in a horrible car accident

Why didn't Joe have any friends? Because according to Thomas Hobbes man is anti-social by nature and therefore the only friends that he has are purely to reach his own ends and thus Joe cannot truly have friends in the sense that many use the word.

I was in the middle of downloading a porno of two hot girls getting it on, my computer got a virus and crashed.

I don't know what I've been told I'm a refrigerator

Why are so many children obese? Because they eat to much and they are not physically active enough

What did polyvore say to wanelo? Nothing They are apps

A black man and a white man were both pulled over for street racing. They both were also found to be drunk driving. Only the black man was arrested. It turns out the black man had just massacred an entire Amish village before going street racing to celebrate.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...