Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he happened to be walking in that general direction.

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What did the headless man say? Nothing. The man can't speak because he doesn't have a head.

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A man walks into a bar and asks "Where is your bathroom?" He is directed towards the restroom, where he then covers himself in toilet paper and calls himself a moose.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the dog, which also fell out of the tree.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread

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You should periodically review the most up-to-date version of the Terms of Service. Oh you.

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What do call a black piano player? A pianist.

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Why did the boy dress up as a zombie? Because it was Halloween.

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What do you call a black man from Germany? A Germ.

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What is the difference between a pumpkin and a dead baby? There are thousands of differences between a dead human and the fruit of a pumpkin plant. One of them is that I didn't choke my wife to death with a pumpkin. Another is that pumpkins have a stem.

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HEY EVERYONE THUMBS UP!

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Did you hear about the speed reader on top of the Twin towers? 90 stories 5 seconds.

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Three men walk into a bar. You'd think one of them would have seen it.

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why did the lady take anti depressants? because she was depressed

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A man calls his 23 year old nephew on a Saturday night. He's calling him, in order to apologise for molesting him when he was younger. As he could no longer live with the guilt and shame. They both start to cry on the phone. The nephew hangs up " I can't do this.." The man receives an email from his boss, saying " Lisa told me she's still waiting for your analysis on the new federal cuts and how they're going to affect us. Please send them asap."

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- I shot the sheriff! - You murderer

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What's better than ice cream? Anal sex

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Yo mama is so fat!

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Q: What's funny about prostitution? A: Nothing. It's a widely misunderstood profession.

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why dont black people like cruise ships? they already fell for that trick 400 years ago

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what did the cat say when he walked into a room full of dogs? Get meowt of here!

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How many friends did Jeffery have? 0 because he ate them and put them in his fridge.

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Dislike if you shag sheep ;)

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Augustus was touring his Empire and noticed a man in the crowd who bore a striking resemblance to himself. Intrigued, he asked: ‘Was your mother at one time in service at the Palace?’ ‘No, your Highness,’ he replied, ‘but my father was.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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