What never seems to get old? AIDS.

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Friends are like snow: If you piss on them, they disappear.

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What did the homeless war veteran get for christmas? Nothing because we don't treat our veterans very well.

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What is Green and taste like an apple? An Apple

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What's black and hangs from trees? tires ...and black people

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My cat used to be afraid of storms. But now it's dead.

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Confucius says... The superior man, when resting in safety, does not forget that danger may come. When in a state of security he does not forget the possibility of ruin. When all is orderly, he does not forget that disorder may come. Thus his person is not endangered, and his States and all their clans are preserved.

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Ok, so, a big moose walks into a store and he looks around for potatoes but he cant find any. So he asked a worker, "do you know where the potatoes are?" and she says, "the potatoes are in aisle 3." So the moose goes to aisle 3 and there aren't any potatoes!

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Where was Sally when the bomb exploded? Everywhere.

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What Happends When Sawdust Gets in your mouth You poop logs

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Why did the black man die? He drove off a cliff.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Actually 6 wasn't afraid of 7 because numbers have are not living things, therefore have no consciousness or emotions, meaning that numerical digits can not have a fear or be afraid of another number.

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A woman's opinion

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Doctor, people always laught at me at work! :( What do you do for a living? I am a comedian...

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Bryce Harlan and I are close friends Love, Pete K

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What does the cup-cake say to the cake? Do you want a cup in your cake to make it cup-cake?

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What is the difference between Michael Jackson and Neil Armstrong? Neil Armstrong was the first one to walk on the moon... and Michael Jackson molested little children.

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1,984

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How many ants does it take to fill an apartment? It depends on the size of the apartment.

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A blonde is standing on the edge of a 20-story building. He's had a rather rough life.

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"I have been threw the desert with a horse with no no name" wrong the horse, name was no name

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I enjoy the fact that the jokes I post that do not make me laugh, are the ones that get zero thumbs, while those that at least make me smile, get at least a couple, I admit thought that its hard to keep track with me, I type jokes so fast that they disappear in the back before people can thumb them... Have you heard... Of the dog that was barking up the wrong three? The three said: Damn dog! I am not a tree! The dog kept barking, as dogs do not speak. Moral: Numbers speak fluently in most languages though...

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An Irishman walked out of a bar. A Frenchman was polite. An Englishman had beautiful teeth.

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How many rednecks does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Three.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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