What did the iceberg say when Titanic crashed on it? "Yeah!"

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Are you gay? No. Ok.

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if a man is alone in the forest, and there are no women around to hear him...........is he still wrong?

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Lady wanna go out sometime? Im not lesbian girl! Im not a girl... OUCHIE!

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What did the cat say to the dog? Nothing, animals are in capable of formal cumunication.

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Chuck Norris is so tough, he trained diligently for many years and is now a widely respected martial artist

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what did the dog say? dogs can't talk therefore he said nothing

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have a gun, Get in the van.

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knock, knock! No answer, they probably can't hear you, use the doorbell.

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? Your mum. Your mum who? Dinner is ready, come down stairs.

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What do you call a fat person with no friends? An individual who is over the expected weight of a person their age, who finds themselves disliked by people in their s surroundings, possibly due to their weight problem, but also it may be because of any personality defects they may have, or they simply may prefer to be alone.

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What did the German say when the whole of India blew up: "Wow, das muss eine gewaltige Explosion haben! Wie haben sie das geschafft?"

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Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?". The operator says "Calm down. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence, then the man said "he has a pulse". The operator then calmly stated "we are sending a helicopter to air lift him out of there as we speak". The man got helicoptered to the nearest ER, and the doctors did their best to save him. He ended up having to go on life support for three years until his family members finally decided to pull the plug. The medical insurance didn't cover life support and the family went broke because of it.

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whats dead and gone your nanas cat

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What did the black guy do to his neighbor's car while he was away? Wash it for a for as a favor.

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What do you call a person with no legs playing soccer? A soccer player.

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Q:Why did suzie fall off the swing A:She had no arms

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Chuck Norris can count from 1 to 100... twice!

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Knock Knock Who's there? Nobel Nobel who? There was no bell, that's why I'm knocking you idiot

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What do you call a baby with no future? A baby dying at birth.

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These Jokes suck.

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On the 12th day of Christmas my true love gave to me nothing because I'm single

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Q: Why did the little Canadian girl start crying ? A: Because her mum through a fridge at her.

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What's the difference between a pen and a tiger? Believe it or not they are both not a cantaloupe.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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