How many dead babies can you fit in a sink? I don't know i forgot to turn the garbage disposal off

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what did the man say to his boss? Hello boss

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why didnt Joe drive the tractor today? Because Joe doesnt have any arms or legs. Why doesnt Joe have any arms or legs? A) Because Joe is a potatoe

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why did the dentist quit his job because he had saved up enough money for his retirement

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When I eat Mi Familia Mexica food, it burns when I go to the bathroom. Is that bad?

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Why was the young black boy kicked out of his classroom? Because the manner of his actions were inexcusable.

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What do you call a dumb blonde with no hair? You don't, since there is no way of knowing that she is blonde.

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whats fluffy and pink? -pink fluff whats blue and fluffy? -pink fluff holding its breath.

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Your mother's breasts sag with such severity that the late great surrealist artist Salvador Dali mistook them for clocks.

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Q: You know what you should add to your recipe? A: No, not really. Tell me. Q: What? Are you expecting an answer now? Why don't you just shoot me, huh?! Pee on my clothes and set them on fire! You racist son of an **orange**.... It certainly tastes better with oranges.

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Joker2? Who comes up with the names anyways? Sounds like a stupid version of the matrix... Anyways, I stutter because my nerves are killing me, I cant quit the painkillers cold turkey if I cant sleep without them, besides I am used to physical pain as tragic as that might sound... Its not when you get used to it. I need to know who this Neo-Nero was, for anyone that can tell me, he is not around here at these hours, and during the time he/she I was dead, did considerable damage to my and my orders reputation, I need a face to face talk to someone that would put aside my chosen successor and assume my role, and I wont let that happen again even if it means bruising up this Neo-me a bit.

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What's the difference between a plum and bunny? They're both purple, except the bunny.

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A man walked into a bar. Ow!

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Why did the handicap man scream for help? Because he fell out of his wheel chair

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Boy: "Mom, I don't want to walk in circles anymore." Mother: "Shut up or I'll nail your other foot to the ground."

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There are two types of people in this world: those who can count and those who can't. I happen to be one of those who can.

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how do you fit 100 babies in a bowl? with a blender. how do you get them back out of the bowl? with tortila chips.

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What did Coke say to Pepsi? "Hello."

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A horse walks into a bar. Being unable to comprehend human emotion, he shits all over the floor.

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why did the chicken cross the road? who cares i dying from cancer

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What did the german get for christmas? an Easy-Bake oven and a G.I. Jew

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One day, 2 people were gonna fight after school and the final bell wrung then they started the mtch and the challenger says, "Hey whats the one thing that you say when you don't want to fight and ypu let the other person win?" The other guy says, "I give up?" Then the challenger says, " I WIN!!!"

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The time and place do not matter because I'm a lesbian.

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Q.What did the anti-joke reader say to the doctor? A-My finger is stuck on the dislike button.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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