What did casino dealer say to the other? Every day I'm shuffling.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Knock Knock Who's there? You have AIDS

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Why does the man hate his job? He thinks working sucks?

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Ok, for Christ’s sake, these sh!tty “animals falling out of a tree” jokes are NOT funny; they were never funny and they’re certainly not getting any funnier with you rehashing them every 5 posts. Fncking stop it.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

What has two arms and two legs? A human being.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

A hitman and his target walked in the same bar togather what happend? nothing because a hitman has better things to do and the target would lay low.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

A blonde, brunette, and a redhead walk into a bar. The redhead, growing tired of the constant ridicule directed at her from the other two solely on her hair color, proceeds to kill them with a single shot glass. She pleads guilty to 3rd degree murder on two counts and is sentenced two life sentences in a maximum security prison in Cambodia.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

A doctor walks out of the delivery room and relieves A nervous father, telling him that his new baby girl has just been born with great health. The father sighs in relief as happiness overwhelms him. With such great news, the doctor chuckles and continues on with the rest of what he had to relay to the father. Your wife died during the delivery.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

MC donald the duck loves Justin's Balls. And Daniel Ma loves fried chicken boiled with rice \Cupcake

thumb_up thumb_down -33

What do you call a white man in the middle of Mexico City? Dave.

thumb_up thumb_down -35

A man walked into a bar. Ouch.

thumb_up thumb_down -35

Why was the man crying in prison? He missed his family and wanted to go home.

thumb_up thumb_down -41

What a person such as you would say. Anyway, did you notice how I started by emulating your way of typing, spelling, spacing and so on?

thumb_up thumb_down -59

What's the difference between a black man and a bag of crap? Quite a bit. The black man is a human male of the Kingdom Animalia, while the bag is an inanimate object. The only similarity between them would be that they both contain organic matter.

thumb_up thumb_down -59

I died shortly after writing this.

thumb_up thumb_down +52

Cat got your tongue? Punch it in the face, and retrieve your tongue.

thumb_up thumb_down +52

Why was the young girl? A doctor told her that due to the fact that she was recently raped, she contracted AIDS.

thumb_up thumb_down +52

If life gives you lemons, steal the declaration of independance and use the lemons and a hair dryer to reveal the numbers on the back. Then enbark on an epic journey that ends with the discovery of the templars treasure. Lastly, use the money you earned to buy some lemons and make some lemonade.

thumb_up thumb_down +50

There were 3 guys named Sean, Ryan, and Eye. They were best friends. However, things escalated when Eye slept with Sean's girlfriend and Ryan found out. Ryan felt he had to tell Sean that Eye slept with Sean's girlfriend. Ryan went up to Sean and said "Dude, Eye slept with your girlfriend!" Then Sean shot Ryan in the head before Ryan realized what he had said. Game Over

thumb_up thumb_down +46

If a tree falls on a woman and there's no one around to hear her scream why did a tree fall in the kitchen?

thumb_up thumb_down +44

What did the Democrat say to the Republican? "I am sorry about your mother". They had been good friends since childhood and the Republicans mother was soon to die from terminal cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

So an irishmen, jewish, and asain walk into the bar...and the bartender said get out..

thumb_up thumb_down +42

What do a black man and an apple have in common? They are both carbon based life forms.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

What do you call it when someone walks on another person's head? It depends. Face up, fetish. Face down, hate crime.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops