what do you call a blonde that spends fifteen thousand dollars at a bar? an alchoholic.

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What's the resemblance between a chicken? Its legs are approximately equal, especially the left one.

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John - hey do you have tickets to see Oasis? Sam - No I bought green day tickets intead. John rolls his eyes at sam very dissapointedly then proceeds to go home. The next day Sam phones John excitedly telling him he traded his Green day tickets for Oasis tickets, a smile appears on Johns and Sams faces, not that they can see each other, they both then put the phone down. An African died. Green Day are a bad band.

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A man tells his wife to leave the kitchen

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I'll be back. Please use the door.

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Wanna hear a dirty joke? A pig rolls in the mud.

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What's better than being in the special olympics? Not being retarded.

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Why can't a blonde woman drive? because she was shot in both legs and cannot operate the pedals without extreme pain.

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UNICORNZ R PURPUL

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KNOCK KNOCK who's there? hello is anybody there? hello?....... .....the number your trying to reach has been removed please hang up the door knob and put the squirrel back in the lawnmower were it belongs.

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I saw a bull go into a public toilet and defacitate! Bullshit!!!!!! hahahahahahahaha!

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Near the tower of London, a woman says to her friend: "You know, I had a feeling my son would come out, and the other day, he did." "What was your first clue?" "We're British."

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Q: Whats A Schoolbus Full Of Black Children??? A: A Rotten Banana!!!

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What's black and fun to hang from trees? Tire swings.

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If an ear could talk what would it say? Probably nothing because it doesn't have a tongue...

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why did ryan go to bed? because he is a growing boy and need it to keep in line for his study's i lied about him sleeping hes dead he was abducted

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the bird fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the monkey. Why did the other bird fall out of the tree? It was shot. Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

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A man walks into a bar. He is genetically predisposed to alcoholism, and it's destroying his family.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have Tourette's, Cheese on toast.

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Ken wins!

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Why John isn't smiling? Becouse he died yesterday

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Why did Jimmy drop his ice cream? He was hit by a truck.

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Knock knock Who's there My BUTTCRACK

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Why did the black man have to stand in the bus? All of the other seats were taken.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops